You Found Me
by Take1risk
Summary: what if there was another school shooting? Set during season 5, still some more Leyton Drama to lead up to that point...
1. Welcome To My Life

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N: alright, this idea came to me one day. I know it talks about a school shooting in the summary but that will come later, I kinda need to build up to that point.**

**You Found Me**

**Chapter 1: Welcome to my Life**

Do you ever feel like breaking down?  
Do you ever feel out of place?  
Like somehow you just don't belong  
And no one understands you?

Why did she come back? Well its obvious now, she was –is- still in love with him. But didn't he always know that? She told him she would always love him, he did the same for her. After his attempt at a proposal he wanted to forget about her; he didn't want to love her anymore. But the thing was; he still did love her after she said no –someday- .

Then he found Lindsay. This was it; he can finally move on from _her._ He doesn't have to wait for _her _to find him again. He doesn't have to love _her _anymore. What he didn't realize is that he still wasn't over _her._ Even with his relationship with Lindsay most of his thoughts were about _her._

He really wished she hadn't come back. He had Lindsay, he loved Lindsay. But she did come back. He still had Lindsay, and he still loved her. But not the way he should, not the way she deserved in this type of relationship. All of this was because of _her_; because she appeared in his life again. It kicked up all the feelings he had for her; all the feelings he tried to burry.

This was it, the last thing that told him the truth; he would always be in love with Peyton Sawyer. With that in mind, he could never love anyone else the way he loved her. No one could ever replace her in his heart; in his life.

---

No, you don't know what it's like  
When nothing feels all right  
You don't know what it's like to be like me

These were the thoughts that consumed his mind as he drove home from Tric. He went into Peyton's office that night. Things went back and forth until she told him she loved him and kissed him. She accused him that he still loved her. After that it all became too much for him so he left. He did what he always did when it came to her; he ran.

He walked up the steps to his bedroom door and got out his keys. He unlocked the door and walked in. When he turned around he was shocked to see Lindsay sitting on the bed, sitting quietly.

Tears were streaming lightly down her face. There was a small black suitcase sitting next to her on the bed. It wasn't until after a few moments did she look at him.

"Lindsay?" He questioned. He didn't know what to make of this. He knew what was on his mind, but what was going on with her?

"I'm going to New York Lucas, I'm not sure when I'll be back." She looked up at him with sad eyes. He lost all of what he was going to say and he walked over to her. He stood in front of her and placed his hands on either side of her face.

"Don't do this, please, you know I love you." He tried, anything just to make her stay.

"then why didn't you give me this?" she held up a little black box; a very familiar black box.

That Black box held an engagement ring in it; Peyton's ring. This brought all of his thoughts of Peyton back into his mind; all the thoughts that consumed his mind on his way back home. He remembered what he came back to say; he remembered what he had to do.

---

Peyton sat on the couch in her office. Lucas had just left. She hadn't done anything yet, she just sat there in her own thoughts.

To be hurt, to feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
And no one's there to save you  
No, you don't know what it's like  
Welcome to my life

She just told Lucas that she loved him, that she came back for him. She kissed him, and he kissed her back. All of this confused her. Was Lucas still in love with her? He couldn't be, I mean he was with Lindsay right? But he kissed her; when she kissed him, he kissed her back. She felt it again; it was almost as if in that moment everything was going to go back to the way it was. But it wasn't going back to how it was. When the kiss ended it was back to reality; back to where Lucas was with Lindsay and she was still alone.

What she did was wrong, she shouldn't have kissed him. But it felt so right, she felt so safe with him; like everything was going to be alright. She needed everything to be alright again; she needed him.

Brooke walked into Peyton's office and saw her sitting on the couch, lost in thought. Her nose was scrunched and her forehead creased a little, her eyes were a little glossed over but still the beautiful green and her lips were pressed together in a straight line. She walked over and took a seat next to Peyton. After there was nothing said, she decided to break the silence.

"hey P, are you ok?" she asked hesitantly. As far as she knew nothing bad had happened, but then again it had been a couple hours since she had seen her and it was Tree Hill.

"I kissed him." She still held her gaze on the floor as she spoke softly.

"you kissed who?" she had a feeling who it was, but she wasn't sure.

"Lucas." She sighed and put her head in her hands. "I told him I loved him and then I kissed him." Brooke nodded. "I came back for him." Tears started to develop in her eyes, she didn't let them fall quite yet.

"I know." Peyton told her she didn't come back for him, but she knew, she knew her best friend. Brooke brought an arm up and wrapped it around Peyton. She had a few questions, but wasn't going to ask them yet. She wanted to let Peyton talk a little before she started.

"It just felt so right, when I kissed him." She looked at Brooke and tears started to fall from her eyes. "It felt like it used to." She looked back to the floor. "I accused him of still being in love with me. He said he had to go see Lindsey." She chocked the last part out. After that she couldn't hold them any longer, she let the tears fall freely, not caring where they landed.

Brooke rubbed her hand up and down Peyton's back. What Peyton did was wrong, she knew that, but she also knew that Peyton loved that boy more than anything. She wanted her to get him back; she wanted Lucas and Peyton back together again.

"what do I do Brooke?" she cried. "I can't just watch them anymore, I want him back." She looked into Brooke's face.

Brooke nodded. She had an idea of what to do, but she wasn't sure if it was the best thing. When Peyton looked at her with those sad eyes, she said it. "you should go see him." When she was sure Peyton was paying attention she continued. "go apologize." She corrected. "but talk to him, that's really the only thing you can do."

---

Do you wanna be somebody else?  
Are you sick of feeling so left out?  
Are you desperate to find something more  
Before your life is over?

"why didn't you?" Lindsey asked him again. More tears started to fall down her face.

He stood in front of her a blank look on his face. He didn't want to say it, he didn't want to break her heart; he didn't want to be the one to break them up. But he had to, for her and for him. He knew he could never give her the love she deserved and that wasn't fair to her. It wasn't fair to him to continue to be with her.

He hated Peyton; he hated her for causing this. He hated her for coming back; but most of all, he hated her because he was still in love with her.

"I.." he trailed off. No, he couldn't use an excuse now, he needed to tell her the truth; she deserved the truth. "because…" he hesitated and look to the floor when he spoke. "… you weren't meant to find it." He looked back up at her and saw hurt and confusion.

"what?" she breathed out. Wasn't meant to find it? What the hell did that mean? She loved him and she thought he loved her; he just told her he did.

He looked at her sadly and his eyes held so much sympathy. "it wasn't meant for you." Her eyes closed.

"when all your dreams come true, is it me who you want standing next to you?" There was silence, he didn't want to say anything. He knew his answer, no, but he didn't want to say it, he didn't want to break her. But he didn't realize that she was already broken.

She held out the little black box for him to take. She stood up as he took the box. She was inches away from him and when she brought her hand up it scared him a little, but he deserved a good slap in the face. Instead, she placed her hand on his heart.

"she is always going to have this isn't she?" she asked so quietly he could barely hear her. When she got no response she nodded and walked over to her suitcase. She laughed somewhat bitterly. "I guess I won't be coming back at all then." She picked up her suitcase. "I really wish you could love me like you love her." She kissed him and the cheek and walked to the door.

"Lindsey…" he called sadly.

"goodbye Lucas." With that she walked out the door.

He was left standing in his room; alone. He didn't want to do it. He really didn't want to tell her that, but he had to. He couldn't give her all his heart, he could never give her all his heart, but now he couldn't give her much of any of it; not while _she_ was back and in his life again.

---

Are you stuck inside a world you hate?  
Are you sick of everyone around  
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies  
While deep inside you're bleeding?

Peyton sat in her car, across the street from Lucas' house. She finally got the courage to walk up to his house. She was just in front of his steps when Lindsey came out. Her heart just about stopped and she thought about running back to her car and just forgetting about everything. She was about to turn around when Lindsey stopped her with her voice.

"It's still you." She said calmly. A few tears escaped her eyes, but she wasn't about to break down here, not yet.

"what?" Peyton stuttered. She turned around and faced Lindsey.

"when all his dreams come true, he still wants you next to him." She didn't want to believe the words, but she knew they were true.

Peyton didn't say anything. When she started to look at the ground she saw the suitcase in Lindsay's hands. No, this couldn't be happening. Of course she wants Lucas back, but she doesn't want his heart to get broken. "you're leaving?" she asks.

Lindsay just nods. "I'm not the one he wants, and I won't let him just settle for me." She says sadly. "goodbye Peyton." She lets one more tear fall and then she walks around Peyton and to the cab that had just arrived.

---

Peyton was at his bedroom door now. She had been for a couple minutes. She still couldn't grasp what was happening. Lindsay left, and not just for the night, she left for good. She didn't know what he would be like; mad, sad, frustrated, perhaps a combination of all of them. She felt for him, she wanted him back, but she didn't want him to get hurt in the process. She knew at least one person would get hurt, but she was thinking about Lindsay, not him. To be honest, she was scared to go in; scared of his reaction.

She had to go in there; she had to talk to him. If she wanted him back, if she wanted any of him, she was going to have to confront him sooner or later. What's life without a few risks right? She had to at least _take 1 risk_, even though she had taken many in her life, she could take one more.

After much debating she brought her hand up and knocked on the door. She heard a little rustling and then the door swung open. She was met with a sad and hurtful face. A face she was expecting, and something she wanted to fix.

"what are you doing here?" he asked a little bit more bitterly than intended. She was the reason that his life was messed up right now; the reason that Lindsay left, right? He didn't want to see her; in his mind right now she ruined his life. Yes, he admitted to Lindsay that Peyton always had his heart, but he didn't want to tell her that; he didn't want to love her.

"Lucas.." she trailed off. There was so much she wanted to say; so much she needed to say. All she wanted to do was take him in her arms and comfort him, tell him that everything was going to be ok, that she was here.

"Lindsay left and it's all your fault." Tears started to develop in his eyes. "why did you have to come back? Why couldn't you just stay away?" he shouted. She winced at his outbursts. Her eyes started to gloss over with tears.

"Lucas, I-I…." he didn't let her finish.

"I wish you never came back!" he shouted at her. "you ruined everything!" tears were starting to fall down his face and it wasn't long before the water fell freely from her eyes. "because of you my heart is gone." The last part came off more calm and then he shut the door in her face.

She stood there for a minute, sobs racking her body. When he said that his heart was gone, she thought he was referring to Lindsey being his heart, but that what she didn't know is that he was really talking about her.

She ran back to her car and started it to get out of there as soon as possible. She got back to the house that she and Brooke shared. Before Brooke could ask what was wrong or even confront Peyton, Peyton was in her room. Brooke quietly walked to her bedroom door and heard the sobs through the loud music Peyton was playing. Oh no, she couldn't have this Peyton back again. She was getting used to having a better Peyton around, even though she wasn't happy. She didn't know the whole story, but she was determined to find out. And determined to help her friend get back to happiness; help both her friends get back to happiness.

To be hurt, to feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
And no one's there to save you  
No, you don't know what it's like  
Welcome to my life

Welcome to my life: Simple plan

**A/N: so what did you think?**


	2. Let Love In

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N: so I'm pretty sure I loved all the reviews!! Thanks so much….and heres your next update!**

**Chapter 2: Let Love In: Goo Goo Dolls**

**(oh yeah, so I haven't really watched the whole 5****th**** season yet, and I don't know much about what happened to Nathan…..and I really need Nathan to be ok in this story so I'm just gonna say that Nanny carrie never came and Nathan never hurt his back.)**

_You wait, wanting this world  
To let you in  
And you stand there  
A frozen light  
In dark and empty streets  
You smile hiding behind  
A God-given face  
But I know you're so much more  
Everything they ignore  
Is all that I need to believe_

She lay beneath the red sheets of her warm bed; not the kind of warmth she wanted though. She wanted Lucas' warmth; his strong harms wrapped around her body in a comforting embrace. She wanted that so bad and to be honest if she told herself that she would never get that warmth again, she didn't know what she would do; she never would admit this hopelessness.

It had been a long, dreadful, night. She didn't ever want to shed another tear over Lucas Scott, but last night brought that wall, that kept the tears from falling, down. He crushed it and she let him. She let herself believe that he still loved her; hell even Lindsey told her that Lucas still wants her. But she wouldn't hear it from someone else, she wouldn't let the words of other people give her hope; but they did even though she knew the only way she would know the truth is to go to Lucas himself. That obviously didn't turn out so well.

The thing that killed the most, the thing that she hated most of all, was that she still loved him so much. She loved him with all her heart.

"Peyton." Brooke softly tapped on the door before she walked into her room. She looked at her friend and her heart broke a little. She walked over and wrapped her arms around Peyton. "are you gonna tell me what happened?" she asked hesitantly. She knew her friend was stubborn, but she did not want the sad and depressed Peyton to be back.

Peyton shook her head from side to side. Over the past few years, mixes of feelings have built up and she never really confronted them until she was back in Tree Hill. Last night those feelings came out in a river of tears. It seems that the river was still rich in feelings, for more tears began to fall from her eyes.

"come on P., talk to me." Brooke pleaded.

Peyton took a deep breath and tried to gather herself. She didn't really want to talk about it and go back to that night, but that's what all her thoughts led to anyway; and Brooke deserves to know.

"he told me that he wished I never came back, that he wished I had stayed away. He told me I ruined everything." She said somberly. There were still tears streaming lightly down her face but they were not as heavy as the night before.

Brooke didn't really know what to say, she was tired of saying 'I'm sorry' and 'everything will be okay' because she knew that Peyton was tired of hearing them too. "what did you ruin?" she asked shocked and a little curious.

"Lindsey left." She looked away from Brooke and to her fiddling fingers. "It probably is my fault, I shouldn't have came back." She said sadly.

"don't say that." Brooke said vehemently. Once she got the surprised look from Peyton and realized what she did, she calmed down. "sorry, it's just Peyton…" she pulled her friend and made her look at her. "…I'm so happy to be back here, and I'm so happy that you're with me. We always wanted to live together." All Peyton did was nod and then Brooke pulled her in for a tight hug, she was happy when Peyton put her arms around her too.

They stayed like that for a while; each of them comfortable with the silence and consumed in their own thoughts. After thinking for a little bit, Brooke came to realization with something.

"Peyton…" Peyton looked to her friend when she pulled away.

---

"Lucas?" Nathan knocked on Lucas' bedroom door. "is it safe to come in, are you guys decent?" he was trying to joke around, but also being serious; he didn't want to walk in on anything like _that_, that involved his brother. When he heard nothing he walked in. "Lucas?" he started to get a little worried.

He didn't see him lying on his bed, so where was he?

"Lucas?" He walked further into the room and his eyes softened. There was a broken picture of Lindsey about 5 feet from him. He had his back against the wall in his bedroom and his legs sprawled out in front of him; he was asleep. Next to him sat an open box. Some of its contents were spread out around him and his hand was resting inside the box. There was one thing that stuck out; a little black box was clutched in Lucas' right hand.

"Luke, come on man." He shook his brother's shoulder.

_You're the only one I ever believed in  
The answer that could never be found  
The moment you decided to let love in  
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel  
The end of fear is where we begin  
The moment we decided to let love in_

Lucas' eyes instantly opened and he looked from side to side; examining his surroundings. Apparently he didn't remember falling asleep, because rays of sun were coming in through his window.

He spent a lot of time last night looking in his 'peyton box'…

"hey, you alright?" Nathan asked, his voice laced with concern. Usually he would have been teasing and just tell Lucas to get over it, but this didn't seem like something to joke about.

"yeah." He said with uncertainty. Then he shook his head. "no, not really."

"well, do you wanna talk about it?" he was really trying to show some brotherly love right now.

Lucas shrugged and then looked up to his brother.

"well, how about we take a trip to the rivercourt, before we head off to practice." Nathan suggested. He had to think of something to get his brother talking.

Lucas took the hand that his brother offered to help him up. When he didn't think Nathan was looking, he took the ring from the box and placed it in his pocket. The thing that he didn't know was that Nathan was looking.

---

"what?" Peyton asked. She used her hands to wipe away at the tears that were still on her face.

"how do you know that this is your fault? Maybe something happened that you don't know about." Brooke said hopefully and trying to lift her friends spirits.

"what are you getting at Brooke?" she was getting easily frustrated and tired of talking about the situation with Lucas, she just wanted to forget it all.

"I guess what I'm really trying to ask is…" she looked Peyton in the eyes. "…You're not going to give up are you?" She knew that Lucas could be a real ass, but she also knew that he made Peyton happy.

"I…what? Give me one good reason Brooke!" she stood from the bed and threw her hands in the air. "all he does is push me away and break my heart, I'm tired of repeating that process every time I try and get him back!" She took a deep breath when she finished. Yeah, she was tired of getting her heart broken and Lucas pushing her away. But she was still in love with him, and that wasn't going anywhere anytime soon; maybe even ever.

"I know P. Sawyer, I know." She stood up next to Peyton and put her arms around her. "but I think you would regret not doing anything now that Lindsey is gone." She pulled away and Peyton gave her a depressed look. "you don't know the whole truth yet, and I believe he still loves you Peyton." She said reassuring. She didn't know if Peyton would do anything, but she sure as hell was going to do something.

---

Nathan and Lucas had been at the rivercourt for about five minutes. The only sound that could be heard was the bouncing of the basketball and _swoosh_ as the ball went through the hoop.

"so are you going to tell me what happened?" Nathan was getting a little tired of Lucas not talking; brooding. He thought the idea of coming to the rivercourt would be good. It was a place that he and Lucas both loved; a place where they could be themselves and talk.

Lucas stopped dribbling and took the ball to sit down on the bleachers. Nathan followed his movements and took a seat next to him. "I screwed up." He said solemnly.

"well if this has anything to do with Peyton, I could've told you that one." Nathan said trying to lighten the mood at least a bit. He looked at his brother and saw the grave expression on his face. "talk to me man, you can trust me." He assured Lucas. He really wanted him to open up; he really wanted him to talk about his real feelings.

"Getting with Lindsay was a big mistake." He was being really short, but Nathan knew the meaning behind all his short replies.

"is that the reason there is a broken frame of her on your bedroom floor?"

Lucas just nodded his head up and down. "she left." Nathan didn't respond he wanted to wait for Lucas to open up a little more. "She found Peyton's ring." He dipped his head to his hands. "she asked why I didn't give it to her, and for once in my life I was honest." Nathan placed a comforting hand on his shoulder when he started to get a little choked up. Lucas looked up to Nathan, tears stung the back of his eyes. "I told her it wasn't meant for her. She basically found out that I can never give her my full heart because…" he trailed off and stared back to a crack in gray concrete.

"because your heart still belongs to Peyton." Nathan stepped in and finished for him. He knew this for a while now, there was a time when he thought that maybe Lucas did love Lindsey but then Peyton came back. It all went downhill from there; or uphill for them, they always wanted Lucas and Peyton again.

"I don't want to love her anymore, she broke my heart; she said no." he started to become a little angered.

Nathan stood up in front of Lucas. "ok I could understand that you are hurt and confused, I want to fix that." He calmed down a little bit; realizing that he raised his voice. He hated when this was brought up. "but you need to stop saying and thinking that Peyton said 'no'. She said someday Luke, and we both know that." His body relaxed and his eyes softened again. "you broke her heart too." He said honestly. He placed a hand on Lucas' shoulder and Lucas looked up at him. "I think it' time you pulled your head out of your ass." Lucas looked away from Nathan's eyes; he had to admit he was ashamed. "start thinking of a plan to get Peyton back, you know you still love her and you know you still want her." He finished earnestly.

He walked over and grabbed the basketball that they used. Lucas glanced up in wonderment of where he was going.

This didn't go unnoticed by Nathan. "come on, we are already late for practice." He gave him a nice smile, to let Lucas know that he still had hope and that he was still there for him. Lucas did his best to give a small smile in return.

---

They just arrived to Tree Hill high. It was a Thursday, and you know what that means? School. So of course Nathan would want to go see his wife on her break. He headed off and left Lucas to walk in by himself.

He started to walk towards the gym; his head was down and he was deep in thought with a blank expression on his face. When he was headed down the hallway someone came stomping out of the gym. The door slammed shut and it startled him from his thoughts. He looked up and was a little surprised to see who it was.

"hey Q what's up?" he asked seriously.

Quentin looked up, he had a very pissed of look on his face.

"like you don't know!" he practically shouted.

Lucas stood up straight. "hey, hey cool down." Lucas attempted to put his hand on Quentin's shoulder but he jerked it away.

"don't touch me." Lucas backed away quickly.

"Q come on, you can talk to me." He tried to get through to him. He honestly had no idea what was going on.

"no, I can't." he shook his head furiously and looked Lucas in the eye. "Your just my basketball coach and you've never showed anything else but that." He pushed Lucas out of the way, hard, and then trudged out of the school.

Lucas looked back to where Quentin had just walked in shock. What was his deal? But he was right, lately Lucas had been nothing more than a basketball coach. Whitey, when he was the coach of Lucas, always had a good head on and helped with problems. Lucas hadn't been like that lately, and it was time he started being more of a friend and a basketball coach.

Nathan came up behind Lucas.

"Hey man, you ok?" he asked with concern.

"yeah, I just…" Lucas looked up and pretended to look in a different direction to avoid meeting Nathan's gaze. "I think I need to get out of here. Will you be ok with practice?" He asked hopefully.

"yeah, I got Skills. But do you want to talk some more?" Nathan was truly getting worried about him. He was acting real distant lately. He knew things were messed up, but Lucas always knew how to handle this kind of stuff. It was different when Lucas was like this.

"no, I think I just need some time alone." He did his best to give his brother a reassuring smile. With barely a glance into his eyes, Lucas left right where Quentin had just gone.

---

Lucas didn't drive himself to the school so he didn't exactly have a car; though he didn't mind walking. He had a lot to think about. Actually not too much, but what he was thinking about, took its toll on him. It's not like the girl he was in love with –yes he finally admitted it to himself- would just leave his mind.

The other thing that troubled him was Quentin. He didn't have a clue what was up. It was more of what Quentin said that bothered him. In his mind he always wanted to be a great coach; someone that the team would look up to; someone kinda like Whitey.

It made him realize that he really hadn't been the same person lately. He needed a change, and he was going to do his damn best to make a change.

---

Peyton was just walking out of her office. She had had enough of work for one day and she just wanted to go home, get comfortable and maybe even make a date with her best friends; Ben and Jerry.

_I wish  
Wishing for you to find your way  
And I'll hold on for all you need  
That's all we need to say  
I'll take my chances while  
You take your time with  
This game you play  
But I can't control your soul  
You need to let me know  
You leaving or you gonna stay_

She tried to push all the thoughts of him aside, but it just wasn't working. She had tried several different things, like listening to music or throwing herself into work, but he just wouldn't leave. The words that Brooke said kept replaying in her head, 'I believe he still loves you'. She was honestly scared to believe that, she was scared of him; scared that he might hurt her again.

_There's nothing we can do about  
The things we have to do without  
The only way to feel again  
Is let love in_

She just reached the exit door when someone was standing in front of her. No, it wasn't him.

"Julian?" she gasped in disbelief.

---

Brooke was on her way to Peyton's studio. She was being the great best friend that she is, and making sure that her best friend was alright. She was almost there, just at a stop light before she would have to turn right, when she saw a certain broody blonde walking down the sidewalk with his head hung awfully low. The light turned green and she proceeded, but didn't go much further until she found a parking spot on the side of the road. She was only a block away from the studio; a little walk wouldn't hurt; besides she needed to talk to Lucas.

"hey Luke!" she called after him as she did her best to speed walk in high heels; she was an expert.

He turned his head up and around to meet the eyes of Brooke. "oh, hey Brooke." He said somberly.

She caught up with him and they began to walk for a little bit. It was silent, and by the time Brooke spoke up the studio was in sight.

"so what's up with you and Peyton?" she asked, already knowing the answer.

He knew that Peyton already talked to Brooke, but he also trusted Brooke. He felt that he could be honest with her, she was a great friend.

They had still been walking and were getting closer and closer to Tric.

He looked up to answer but got sidetracked when he saw someone standing in front of Tric talking with Peyton; and it wasn't a girl.

"who is that?" Lucas said barely above a whisper.

_You're the only one I ever believed in  
The answer that could never be found  
The moment you decided to let love in  
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel  
The end of fear is where we begin  
The moment we decided to let love in_

**A/N: so how goes it??? Haha.**

**I know I said school shooting….I just need to build up to that point….**

**Please review!!**


	3. Fix You

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N: sorry it took longer…..dumb school and homework!!! But I had no school today, it was canceled cause of the cold, yay!!!! Haha anyways thank you so much for the reviews, I love every one of them. And look forward to hearing from all of you!!**

**Chapter 3: Fix You: Coldplay **

**(this song is so amazing!!)**

_When you try your best, but you don't succeed  
When you get what you want, but not what you need  
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep  
Stuck in reverse_

After he saw Peyton a week ago it seemed that was what consumed his mind; thoughts of her. _Who was that guy? What was she doing with him?.....why was he caring so much? _ He told himself that he wasn't allowed to think these things. He hurt her, he told her to go away; he pushed her away. But the thing was, he couldn't stop thinking about her; her and this, this _guy._ A guy he knew nothing about, but he already wanted to get in his face.

He should've known that she would find someone. After all, he did leave her. He published his book and it felt great. The only thing that was missing was Peyton. He settled for Lindsey; he didn't wait for Peyton like he promised.

It wasn't fair to Peyton, to think things like this; to be like this when there were other guys. He knew that she had a life that didn't involve him. He knew that she wasn't his anymore. But that doesn't mean he didn't want her to be. It was too hard imagining her with someone else; he couldn't imagine her with someone else. I guess he always thought that she would always be in love with him and always be after him. But now with someone else in the picture, he didn't know what to believe.

All he knew is that he didn't want Peyton with anyone else. He wanted her to be his. Better late than never, huh?

_And the tears come streaming down your face  
When you lose something you can't replace  
When you love someone, but it goes to waste  
Could it be worse?_

---

"Hey Curly." Julian walked into Peyton's office.

She still couldn't believe that he was here. With all the crap going on she sort of forgot about him. It wasn't until she saw him that she remembered him. _What was he doing back anyways?_

"How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that?" Peyton started to get annoyed. Ever since he came back he was always around her. Yeah sure, he was arrogant and could be really annoying. But she had to admit, it was nice to have someone want to be around her; and someone of the opposite gender.

"sorry, I can call you whatever I want. You're not my boss." He smirked at her. Yes his smirk was charming, but it wasn't the one that she missed the most.

"yeah but I can kick you out of my office." She sneered.

His smirk fell from his face. "ok, ok I'll stop. But you have to go to lunch with me."

Her mouth dropped open, but she was quick to put it back up. She had spent a lot of time with him in the past week, but she didn't see this coming; though she should've.

He waited nervously for her response. He came to Tree Hill looking for Lucas Scott, but when he found out that Peyton Sawyer lived here too, his plans changed a little. He had been holding off for a week, but it was now or never.

He brought a hand up to rub it against his scruffy face and looked into her eyes hopefully. "okay." She stood up and grabbed her jacket from the back of her chair.

"okay." He smiled brightly and in victory.

_Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you_

---

"Luke?" Nathan just walked into his older brother's house. "I know you're in here!" he playfully shouted. The truth was, Lucas hasn't left his house much.

"right here Nate." He walked out of his room fully clothed but had just gotten out of the shower.

"oh good, you showered." Nathan joked. Lucas chuckled.

He had a towel in his hair and was rubbing it across his head to try and dry it. When he finished he threw the towel back into the bathroom and continued down the hallway. "what's up?" he tried to act like nothing had been going on, but that didn't fool Nathan; he saw right through it.

He decided not to dwell on it now. "I wanted to know if you wanted to join me for lunch." He was hopeful.

"sure, I can do that." He nodded his head and grabbed a sweatshirt off the couch. "where to?"

"how about that little Chinese restaurant we love?" Nathan suggested. He didn't really care where, he just wanted to get a chance to talk to his brother again.

"sounds perfect." Lucas gave a small smile and opened the door. "you're car or my car?"

"umm, how about we walk?" he gave Lucas an unsure look. The look that Lucas gave him caused him to speak up again. "it's not that far, come on!"

"okay."

---

They had been walking for a little while and were getting closer to the restaurant.

"so you excited for the big game next Friday?" He had tried to come up with ways to really talk to Lucas, but he was epically failing. So as he thought about what else to say he was coming up with other stuff.

"you know, I am." Lucas said honestly, he looked to Nathan and then back ahead of him. "I mean it's sort of exciting, going to state but as a coach."

"yeah, I know what you mean."

"It will be weird though and a little tough without Q." He said with a hint of disappointment. He really liked Quentin, he was a little sad to see him go; he wanted to change that.

"yeah, but he wasn't keeping his grades up and he missed a lot of practices." Nathan stated.

"yeah, but his little brother was in the hospital." Lucas began to get a little aggravated. "can you imagine going through that? It must have been really hard." His voice softened.

Nathan never really thought about it that way. I mean he felt bad and all, but he never really thought about it. Skills was actually the one that kicked him off the team, Nathan just listened to Skills's reasons.

They were almost to the entrance of the restaurant when Lucas looked in the side window.

"you know, I think my stomach was lying to me." He did his best to joke. He took another glance at the two people sitting at a table. It looks like Peyton and Julian had the same idea. "I'm feeling some pizza. Is that ok?" He looked to his brother anxiously, he really wanted to get out of there.

Nathan also noticed the two people sitting in the restaurant. "yeah, yeah that's fine." He assured his older brother. It was then that he realized that something seriously needed to be done for his brother to stop acting this way.

_And high up above or down below  
When you're too in love to let it go  
But if you never try you'll never know  
Just what you're worth_

---  
"I'm really sorry dad." Quentin said for about the hundredth time. He and his dad were driving down a street in Tree Hill. His parents were divorced so he didn't get to see his dad much; though his dad did live just outside of Tree Hill.

"I know you are and I know what happened was hard." He looked to his son. "but you needed, need, that team so bad Quentin." He was being serious and was really worried about his son's future. Though his son didn't live with him, he still supported him in basketball and did his best to make it to every game. He made sure to support his son, because they didn't really have the money to send Quentin to college so they needed a scholarship. He couldn't help but be a little disappointed with the news that Quentin got kicked off the basketball team.

"I know!" Quentin shouted. He was getting tired of hearing this over and over again; hearing the disappointment and anger in his father's voice.

"I don't know what to do anymore." His dad said sadly. "it was so hard all ready, now we have nothing." His voice began to get more angry and he turned back to the road.

"sure, now it's on to Andre, right?" he shouted. "I failed so now there is no hope left. Now you move to Andre and hope for better." He spat out.

He turned to his son in disbelief, but anger was still evident on his face.

"dad watch out!" Quentin shouted.

---

_Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you_

"thank you for lunch." Peyton said shyly. She hadn't really been out in a while and it felt…nice. She never imagined Julian coming back.

"it was my pleasure." Julian said honestly. He opened the door for her and then quickly ran to his side to start the car.

They had been driving for a little while, in silence. It was a little bit uncomfortable for Peyton, but she didn't know what to say; she didn't really feel anything. Finally Julian decided to break the silence.

"You know I came here for a reason." He started, his eyes still focused on the road but his mind off somewhere else. "but when I saw you, my reasons changed." He looked to her face. She was staring at him with a bit of shock on her face. "I never really got over you." He said honestly.

When Peyton saw something out of the driver's side window she spoke up.

"Julian watch out!" she panicked.

---

Lucas and Nathan were in a local pizza place in Tree Hill. It was little and on the corner of two streets.

"hey Lucas." Nathan said as he finished up a slice of pepperoni pizza. When he got no response he looked up to see Lucas' shocked face. "Luke you ok?" he followed Lucas gaze to outside where two cars had just collided.

In the blink of an eye Lucas was up and running out the door. At first he thought Lucas was just being a good guy, well he is, but then he saw blonde curly hair step out of the car; he knew exactly who it was. He quickly stood up and followed his brother to go help.  
---

Lucas ran to Peyton first.

"are you ok?" he asked frantically, his eyes trailing over her body to make sure nothing serious was wrong. Her head had a scratch on it and she may have some bruises but it wasn't too bad.

"yeah." She said breathlessly. A few tears fell from her face, it was so scary, she just couldn't believe it. Seeing her terrified face he pulled her into a hug. Everything that happened flew out the window and he just let it go in that moment; he just needed to make sure she was ok. She didn't pull away, instead she wrapped her arms around him too. She just needed that; needed to know that someone could be there to save her.

"here is Nathan, go with him." He said firmly and he handed her to Nathan and rushed over to the cars.

He went to the car that Peyton had just gotten out of, he noticed someone in the front seat and went over to him.

"are you ok?" he asked while he yanked the door open. It took a few tries but he finally got it open. Julian wasn't to beat up either but his leg looked hurt and he had some bruises and a cut on his forehead. Without any thought Lucas put his arm under Julian's legs and wrapped Julian's arm around his shoulder to lift him up.

He began to carry him to the side where the ambulance had just arrived.

Julian finally broke away from his blackout. "my girlfriend." He shouted frantically. "is my girlfriend ok?" he looked to Lucas.

Lucas looked down to Julian's face. They were already boyfriend and girlfriend? His face fell. "yeah, she's fine." He assured him and handed him off to the paramedic.

_Tears stream down your face  
When you lose something you cannot replace  
Tears stream down your face  
And I..._

---

Nathan told Peyton to go see the paramedic and he lead her over. He told her that he would be back soon to check on her and he ran off to find Lucas.

"hey Luke!" he shouted. He looked around frantically for his brother.

"Nathan!" Lucas shouted. Nathan followed his voice and found him crouched by the other car. The car was flipped over on its top after swerving and hitting another car to be flipped over.  
Nathan's face fell as he neared Lucas. "is that.." he didn't finish the sentence before Lucas answered.

"Quentin."

"listen, I need you guys to move out of the way, go to the sidewalk." A police man and some other men had come over and were rushing them out of there. But they understood why, they needed to get the people out of the car.

"come on man." Nathan pulled his brother by the arm. Lucas didn't even realize that he was being pulled away; all he was focused on was Quentin and his dad. They were both in pretty bad shape.

---

"Peyton are you ok?" Brooke had just arrived at the hospital and when she found her best friend she sighed in relief.

"I'm fine Brooke." She had a bandage on a cut that she had on her forehead and a couple bruises on her face; other than that she was fine. She stood up from her chair and embraced Brooke. "it was so scary." Tears started to fall from her face, not of physical pain, but of emotional pain.

"I know, I know." Brooke rubbed her hand up and down Peyton's back and whispered soothing words in her ear. "is Julian ok?" she asked hesitantly.

Peyton pulled away and nodded. "he is going to be fine, they didn't hit us that bad, they swerved out of the way."

Brooke pulled her in for another hug. When she got the call from Peyton that she was in an accident she got so worried. She dropped what she was doing and came right away; their like sister's, that's what sister's do.

"can you take me to Tric?" Peyton asked. "I need to get a few thing and my car, then I'll come back here." She let out shakily; she wasn't excited to get back into a car.

"Peyt I don't think it's a good idea to drive." Brooke said, her voice laced with worry.

"It's fine Brooke, I'm fine can we please just go." You could tell that something was upsetting her.

"ok, but how about we get your car a tomorrow." Brooke pleaded. She really didn't want Peyton to drive yet.

"Fine. But can we just get out of here." She huffed. "I'll check on Julian later, I want to go home."

---

She walked into Tric and passed all the stupid drunk guys as the bar and into her office. She slumped down in her desk chair and took a moment to relax. A lot had happened today; Julian asked her out to lunch, the accident…Lucas. Even though he wasn't even there for that long, he was still there. He was there when she needed someone. She didn't forget what he said, what had happened between them; but it was hard to be angry when he saved her again. Even if he didn't rescue her from a burning car, he was there to hold her.

It was nice to have him do it again for a change, instead of having someone else hold her or tell her that everything is going to be ok; she missed him being that guy. For a moment today it seemed like he could be that guy again, but she didn't know if it would ever be possible again; she didn't know if she could forgive him.

After a few more moments of her and her thoughts she grabbed her stuff from her desk. She had to hurry, Brooke was waiting outside and she promised that Brooke could give her a ride home.

She walked out of her office and on her way out of her office she walked by the bar again. As she was walking by, one of the men at the bar caught her eye.

_Tears stream down on your face  
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes  
Tears stream down your face  
And I..._

"Lucas." She said sadly under her breath.

He was sitting at the bar, his head lying on his arm that was across the bar. A little cup was in his hand and he looked like he was almost passed out.

This surprised her, she didn't expect this at all from him. It could have been Lindsey, but honestly, with him, she didn't know what to think anymore.

"Lucas." She put her hand on his shoulder. "hey." She shook him lightly. She didn't want to feel this way about him anymore; she didn't want to feel like she had to take care of him. His head shot up and he looked around.

"Peyton?" he asked almost as if he was dreaming.

She looked sadly to him. His eyes held so much sadness and pain; she didn't know why. "come on." She grabbed his arm and tried to help him up out of the bar. He stumbled a little, but eventually they started to walk a little steadily.

_Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you_

**A/N: so how was it?? I really enjoy writing this fic, its fun and its new. Sorta.. Haha so please leave a review..cause you know I write for you! Haha wow I'm tired….**

**P.S. do you guys enjoy the lyrics?? Like are they ok?? Seriously I recommend all these songs.**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing!! You know I love you guys for that!**

**EM**


	4. A Message

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N: ok who hates finals and school??? (raises hand) I do! Seriously this past week has been so chaotic cause I got another day off of school last last Friday along with that Thursday and it messed everything up. I had 6 freaking tests!!! It was crazy and very stressful! **

**Sorry…..I really do try though.**

**Hope you enjoy =)**

**Chapter 4: A message: Coldplay**

_My song is love  
Love to the loveless shown  
And it goes on  
You don't have to be alone  
_

After Peyton helped Lucas into the car, Brooke drove to Lucas' house. It was quiet along the way, and somehow Lucas had fallen into a light sleep. Brooke didn't ask questions, and Peyton didn't even make an effort to explain it; they both knew they could talk later. After a few minutes they pulled up to Lucas' house.

"Brooke you can head home, I'll walk from here." Peyton said while getting out of the car. She walked over to the back and opened up the door on Lucas' side.

"Peyton…" Brooke protested. Peyton looked to her best friend.

"it's not that far, I'll be fine; I promise." She assured her.

Brooke didn't protest anymore; she knew it would do no good. She just watched as Peyton took care of Lucas.

"Luke." Peyton shook him lightly. In a matter of seconds Lucas began to stir in the back seat. When his eyes fluttered open he was met with the most beautiful green eyes. When she noticed he was awake she gave him a small smile. Without a word she reached her hand out to help him out of the car.

"I'll see you at home." Brooke stated instead of asked.

"yeah." Peyton shut the door and continued to help Lucas up the sidewalk to his house.

---

Quentin sat in his hospital bed. He wished that what was going on was a dream. This wasn't happening; it couldn't. His family depended so much on his dad; he needed his dad.

"hey Q." Nathan walked into the room hesitantly. "how you holding up?" he asked sincerely.

Quentin didn't take his gaze off of the window and his face held no emotion. He hasn't talked to anybody since he found out that his dad was dead. He didn't want to; he didn't want to believe that his dad was really gone.

"you know we miss you." He was referring to basketball. He didn't know how well that statement would go, but decided to give it a try.

Quentin took his eyes of the window and looked at Nathan with disbelief; did he really just ask that? This set him off. "we miss you?" he spat out. Nathan flinched a little at the sudden outburst from him. "we miss you?" he shouted again. "that's the best you got?" he asked rhetorically. "if you miss me so much why did you kick me off the team?!" he was fuming. After a few seconds his breathing started to calm and his anger turned into other emotions. "if I was still on the team I wouldn't be here right now." Tears came to his eyes and he did his best not to let them fall. "my dad would still be alive." The wall that kept the tears in his eyes became cracked as a few tears escaped. He lifted up his good hand and furiously wiped them away.

Nathan searched his mind for anything to say, anything comforting. He wasn't Lucas, he didn't know how to come up with amazing speeches. "Q you don't know that." Nathan protested.

"yes I do." Those were the last words he said before he turned back to the window.

---

_Your heavy heart  
Is made of stone  
And it's so hard to see you clearly  
You don't have to be on your own  
You don't have to be on your own_

She used his keys and unlocked his door. She hadn't been at this door since the night Lindsey had left. She had to admit it wasn't easy being here again. She helped him inside and over to the bed. He immediately fell onto it like a tree that was being cut down. His arm was wrapped around her shoulder so she was pulled down with him.

"Lucas!" she chuckled lightly. He laughed along with her. She pulled his arm off of her and turned him over. She took his shirt off and his pants; man was this awkward, but she knew how uncomfortable it was to sleep in jeans. "move!" she demanded and when he obliged she moved the covers down the bed. She gently pulled his arm and guided him into his side of the bed…did she just say his side; the whole bed is his.

"you're so good to me." He finally spoke up. He didn't meet eye contact with her and he laid his head on the pillow.

At that statement she paused for a moment. She quickly brushed all her thoughts away and pulled the covers over his body. She smiled softly when she saw he was already well on his way into dreamland; little did she know that his dreamland usually consisted of her. She leaned over and kissed his temple before taking one last look at him and walking towards the door.

She just reached the door when she was stopped by his voice.

"Peyton." He spoke softly.

She turned around and looked at him with a small smile gracing her lips. "I'm sorry." His eyes saddened and his voice was laced with love.

Her face turned into a look of confusion and shock. Was he really saying this? Even though they were two words, they held so much.

"I love you." He said barely above a whisper, but enough so she could hear. He met her eyes once before he turned around and when his head hit the pillow he was out.

_And I'm not gonna take it back  
Oh I'm not gonna say I don't mean that  
You're the target that im aiming at  
Got to get that message home_

She froze in her spot and her eyes widened. She couldn't believe the words that just came out of his mouth. She opened her mouth to say something, anything to understand where all this was coming from. When realization hit that he was out cold and tons of alcohol was in his system she decided against it. She quietly opened the door and walked out. She definitely needed this walk home.

_My song is love  
My song is love unknown  
But I'm on fire for you, clearly  
You don't have to be alone  
You don't have to be on your own_

---

She just reached her and Brooke's house. It wasn't that long of a walk to the house, but she decided to take a little bit longer route to think a little bit. There was definitely a hell of a lot of thinking was done.

_Did he mean those words? Did they really come out of his mouth? Yes, she heard them, but he didn't mean them. He was drunk he couldn't have meant any of those words._

When she walked through the door she immediately noticed Brooke sitting on the couch watching TV.

"there you are." She said relieved. "what took you so long?" she asked concerned. She couldn't help but be a little concerned. With Lucas, nothing went well lately.

"I just took a longer way home." She was on her way to her room when she was stopped by Brooke.

"Come on Peyton." Brooke pleaded. They both knew exactly what she was talking about. She did her best attempt at a puppy dog face.

"this isn't a joke Brooke." Peyton said a little harsher than intended. Brooke's face snapped back to normal and her head went up a little. "sorry, it's just been a long day." Peyton said honestly.

"you can talk to me P." she reminded her blonde best friend.

Peyton just nodded softly before going to sit on the couch. Once she sat down a few tears escaped her eyes.

"what did he do this time?" She followed Peyton and sat next to her on the couch, bringing her in for a side hug.

"he didn't do anything." She said softly. "well he did, but nothing bad. I'm just confused and I don't know what to do." She said, frustration escaping into her voice.

"you're going to have to give me more information than that." She smiled and pulled away.

"he told me he was sorry." Peyton looked to the ground. Brooke didn't say anything, already knowing that there was more to it. Peyton looked back up to meet Brooke's face. "he told me he loved me." She finished.

Brooke looked at her in shock for a brief moment before gathering herself again. She knew that that was true, but she didn't expect Lucas to tell her; the alcohol may have helped a little bit.

"I think I'm gonna go to bed." Peyton stood up and quietly began to walk to her room.

"Peyton." She turned around at a voice for the second time that night.

"yeah?" she waited patiently for Brooke to respond.

"do you love him?" she asked, already knowing the answer, just needing to hear the words.

She didn't answer for a few seconds and there was just silence. Peyton's gaze drifted to her hands that she was playing with. "I do." She said honestly. She looked back up and Brooke noticed a few tears that had fallen from Peyton's eyes. She nodded and then turned around to go to her room.

_And I'm not gonna take it back  
Oh I'm not gonna say I don't mean that  
You're the target that im aiming at  
And I'm nothing on my own_

_Got to get that message home_

In her room she took out a shirt from her dresser that hadn't been worn in a while. It was her favorite shirt to wear to bed, only for one reason; it was Lucas'. It still smelt a little like him and it brought her comfort. She stole it from him when they were dating, making the excuse that he left it at her apartment and forgot to give it back.

She crawled into bed and pulled the blankets tightly around her. She was lost, she didn't know what to do. She knew what she wanted, she wanted Lucas. But she didn't know how to make anything work anymore; she didn't know what to think anymore.

---

Quentin was still in that damn hospital bed.

He wasn't doing good, well physically he was fine, the emotional part was a whole other story. There were many thoughts going through his head; of his dad, basketball, his family, his future. There was one that stuck out in particular. He was so angry and sad. He couldn't think of anything happy and he couldn't see a future that he enjoyed. He wasn't looking forward to burying his dad, or facing his family. He wasn't ready for what was to come in his future, if there even was one. He had to do something, anything to make this pain go away. Right now he hated basketball, and his team for letting him down; giving up on him. He wanted revenge.

There were occasional times a few years back when his dad would take him to the gun range. He didn't know why this thought came up, but it did and it wasn't going anywhere soon. All he could think about was finding that gun.

---

Lucas stirred in his bed and reached to the side; reaching for someone. But there was no one there.

"Peyton?" he asked into the air. His eyes opened and he looked around. She was gone, she hadn't stayed. More thoughts of last night came rushing into his mind. He told her that he loved her.

He didn't know why he said it, but a part of him was relieved. She needed to know, he needed her to know. He wanted her back so bad and if that was the start of something than he had to finish it.

_And I'm not gonna stand and wait  
Not gonna believe it until its much too late  
On a platform I'm gonna stand and say  
That I'm nothing on my own  
And I love you, please come home_

My song is love, is love unknown  
And I've got to get that message home

**A/N: so you noticed it's getting closer to the shooting?? Sorry if you guys have been waiting for that, but it's getting there!!**

**I will update the heart will lead you home very soon!! That one is next, I'm starting it tomorrow!!**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing!! You know I love you guys for that!**

**EM**


	5. It's Not Over

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N: So it's been a while huh?? I know it was but I just got this new math class and its kind of difficult and takes forever to do home work. And I also had another story that was stressing me out and taking up some time but I couldn't write it it was too hard. Sorry for those who did read my other story….**

**Anyways here is the new chapter!! I hope you enjoy the song! **

**Chapter 5: It's Not Over: Chris Daughtry **

_I was blown away  
What could I say  
It all seemed to make sense.  
You've taken away everything  
And I can't deal with that.  
_

Peyton sat in her office, contemplating the words that Lucas said to her last night. She wanted to believe them, she really did. She wanted those words to make everything ok; make everything between them less complicated and done with. But the world didn't work that way. All the drama and everything they went through and are going through are still there; it's not like it could just disappear.

Did those words hit her heart? Of course they did, she had wanted to hear those words forever. But of course she had pictured it going a lot differently; something more on the romantic side or it just being an amazing moment; not him drunk and almost slurring the words. Now that they had been said, she didn't know what to do.

Did she love him back? Of course she loved him, she never stopped. She wanted nothing more than to just jump in his arms and have everything be ok. But her head told her differently; it told her not to let him in again, not to be with him again. With her dream job and awesome friends, she would be able to get through life without him. Right? Couldn't she just live her life without him and just have all the other good things? She could try, she could definitely try. But did it matter without him?

_  
I try to see the good in life.  
But good things in life are hard to find.  
I'll blow it away, blow it away  
Can we make this something good?_

"Hey Nate." Peyton spoke into her phone. She dialed his number in hopes of him picking up. "yeah can you do me a favor?" she couldn't just leave Lucas alone and not make sure he was ok. She just didn't want to have to walk over.

_(Well I'll try to do to it right this time around)  
Let's start over,  
Try to do it right this time around  
It's not over  
Cause a part of me is dead and in the ground.  
This love is killin me  
But you're the only one  
It's not over.  
_

---

"Luke?" Nathan walked in Lucas' bedroom door. After getting the call from Peyton he went right over there. She didn't tell him anything really, but her voice told her that something was wrong. He would do anything for his best friend; for any of his friends.

He walked further in and he was experiencing déjà vu. His brother was asleep up against a wall; legs sprawled out in front of him. And if you haven't guessed already, there was an open box next to his left leg; his 'Peyton box'.

He walked over and shook him lightly. If it wasn't for what was going on he would slap him on the head, do something fun to wake him up. "Luke."

He stirred a little before his eyes opened. "Nate." He said groggily. "what are you doing here?"

_  
I've taken all I can take  
And I cannot wait  
We're wasting too much time  
Being strong and holding on  
Can't let it bring us down  
_

"Checking up on you." He said lightly. "You've been distant and not yourself." He said honestly.

"I don't need checking up on." He said getting a little angry and annoyed. He stood up fast and swayed a little before Nathan steadied him. They looked at each other and Nathan gave him a skeptical look. "head rush."

"Lucas." Nathan said concerned as Lucas began to walk out of his room toward the kitchen.

"Nathan, I don't need anyone's help!" Lucas shouted as he turned around to face Nathan.

It was silent for a couple of minutes. Lucas was in the kitchen getting water and aspirin when Nathan walked in.

"you know Luke, you were always the one to save people; the one to want to help everyone with their problems." Lucas was staring at his glass of water as Nathan moved to sit down next to him. "when it comes to you, you feel like you don't need anyone. But Luke, even hero's need people to save them."

Lucas still hadn't said anything, his gaze still focused on his glass of water. Truthfully he didn't know what to say to that. He was tired of everyone feeling like they need to babysit him; he wasn't a baby he didn't need them.

"I'm fine Nate." He thought about talking about last night, but decided against it. He didn't really feel like bring it up and talking about it; it hurt too much. Though he was glad that he said those words, he had no idea what to expect from Peyton.

"if you're fine then you wouldn't have that box sitting on your bedroom floor, you would be heading to school for basketball practice and you wouldn't be drinking." Nathan said knowingly.

"I hardly ever drink, is it that bad to have some every once in a while?"

"well when you get wasted a couple nights a week it tends to get real bad." Nathan stood up. Feeling defeated, Lucas wasn't going to talk to him and he knew that. "you need to come out of whatever you're in Luke, it's obviously not holding any answers for you." Nathan walked to the door and placed his hand on the door knob, before he opened the door he turned around. Lucas looked up and they looked to each other's faces. "I miss my brother, my best friend. What happened to him?"

---

Lucas walked back into his room. He stood in the doorway and gazed over at the box lying on the floor by his closet. The whole time his face held a saddened look. Nathan was right, he had been different and he did need help; he just didn't want to admit that to anyone else.

He walked over to the box and bent down picking it up and bringing it to his bed. He sorted through it picking up various pictures and little things that reminded him of Peyton or was connected to her in some way.

_  
My life with you means everything  
So I won't give up that easily  
I'll blow it away, blow it away  
Can make this something good?  
Cause it's all misunderstood?_

He couldn't deny that he never stopped loving her. He missed her so much and he just needed her back, need her to hold. In that moment he decided that he was going to fight for her; he was going to do everything he could to win her back. Screw Julian, he loved Peyton and he wasn't going to let a guy like Julian stop him from getting her back.

_  
(Well I'll try to do to it right this time around)  
Let's start over,  
Try to do it right this time around  
It's not over  
Cause a part of me is dead and in the ground.  
This love is killin me  
But you're the only one  
It's not over._

---

"hey dawg, where's Luke?" Skills asked as Nathan walked into the gym.

"he can't make it today man." Nathan said. You could tell he didn't really want to get into it here.

"alright, well hopefully he can come tomorrow cause you know we have that basketball game during the day."

"yeah I know."

Skills didn't want to push it anymore, he knew something was up with Lucas, but now wasn't the best time. The boys had just walked into the gym.

"alright let's start with some lay ups!" he shouted to the team.

---

Lucas walked up the steps to Tric. To say he was nervous was an understatement. His hands were in his pockets and his back was set in that nervous way. He knocked once on her office door and there was no answer. He stepped away and turned around to start walking out. He stopped in his tracks; he was going to fight for her right? If he was going to be a chicken he wasn't going to get anywhere.

He turned around and slowly opened the door.

"Peyton?" he walked further into her office and he still couldn't see her anywhere.

"she isn't here." Came a voice from over by the recording studio.

He turned around and noticed someone walking towards him. "you must be mia." He held out his hand. "Lucas Scott." She brought her hand to meet his and shook.

"I know plenty about you." She smiled as he gave her a confused look.

"me and Peyton are pretty tight." He nodded.

"do you know where I can find her?" You could hear the anxiousness in his voice and see it in his body movements.

"sorry I'm not really sure where she is, she just told me she had to go out." He looked down and nodded in understanding. "she did seem kind of distant today though." She gave him a sad smile. She had heard a little bit about him from Peyton. She couldn't help but feel for them.

"thank you for your help Mia." He gave her a small smile then walked out.

---

"Julian Baker's room please." Peyton asked the nurse.

"room 245." Peyton gave the nurse a thankful nod and smile.

Hesitantly she walked down the hall to his room. She was a little nervous, she could tell that he liked her and she didn't want him to get the wrong impression. He really was a great guy, but she just didn't think about him that way; not when Lucas was in her life again.

When she arrived at the room she debated on whether or not to go in. Feeling a burst of confidence she walked in.

"Peyton." Came his voice from the bed. It was laced with surprise and excitement. He was happy to see her.

"hey Julian." She said shyly. She didn't know where to start; what to say. It was a little sad seeing him in the bed, when he was usually a guy that couldn't sit down.

"what do I owe this pleasure?" he flashed his famous smirk and on most women it would have worked; but compared to the Scott smirk, it was nothing.

Lucas just got done at the nurse's station and was walking down the hallway towards Julian's room. He was about to open the door; he was ready to tell Julian off, tell him that he wasn't going to make this easy. He had a burst of confidence but then he heard a familiar voice; Peyton. He thought about still going in, but he turned around and started to walk away. It's not like he wasn't going to fight for her, he just didn't want her to be angry; she deserved to be happy.

_We can't let this get away  
Let it out, let it out  
Don't get caught up in yourself  
Let it out._

---

"hey sweetie." Haley ran up and wrapped her arms around Nathan's neck. "how was your day?" she asked with a smile. When there was no response and he pulled away quickly with a worried expression on his face, her smile faded. "what's wrong?" she asked, her voice laced with concern.

"I just don't know what to do anymore." He sat down on the couch and Haley sat on his lap.

"about what?" she brought her hand to his cheek and stroked it softly.

"with Luke, he's just in a bad place right now and I don't know what to do to help him."

Haley looked into her husband's eyes. "I haven't really talked to him lately, maybe I should." She felt guilty. With a lot of stuff going on she wasn't really focusing on her friends life right now.

"I think he just needs Peyton back. Without her I don't know what much else we can do."

"he will come around, he's a Scott, we can get through anything.

---

"Hey , whats up?" Brooke heard the door open in her store and she looked up to find Peyton.

"I talked to Julian." She said quietly.

"and?" Brooke wasn't really sure if she meant she talked to Julian about Lucas or if she talked about starting a relationship with him.

"I told him that I'm still in love with someone else." She smiled softly. "he wasn't exactly thrilled, he looked heartbroken, but I couldn't be with him."

"I'm happy for you Peyt, you know people are right when they say that things eventually get better." Brooke walked over and pulled Peyton in for a hug.

Peyton hugged her back and when she pulled away her face became serious. "I told him I'm in love with another man, but…" her face turned sad and she looked to the floor. "I don't know if I can do this again. I love Luke, but it is just so scary." A few tears slipped out of her eyes.

"Peyton." Brooke said softly to get her attention. When Peyton didn't look up, Brooke lifted her chin. "I'm not going to sit here and tell you what you have to do or what not to do. But you have to ask yourself…" she looked into Peyton's eyes to make sure she was paying attention. "…do you love Lucas enough to the point where nothing else matters? I mean think about it really Peyton." Her voice grew more serious. "can you see yourself without him, even with all your fears and insecurities? Can you honestly tell me you don't want to be with him again? Can you promise that later on in life you won't regret this?"

A few more tears had fallen from Peyton's eyes. All these thoughts running through her head exhausted her. She was so tired of crying over love and not having it in her life. She just wanted to go back a couple years and say yes!

_  
Let's start over  
Well try to do to it right this time around  
Its not over  
Cause a part of me is dead and in the ground.  
This love is killin me  
But you're the only one  
It's not over._

---

The next day Lucas was already out of bed. He had to be, even with all the crap going on he still had to be at work. Nathan and Skills had something to do so he had to take over and be there. He wasn't exactly excited or in the best position to be here but he owed it to the team.

_Lets start over  
Its not over  
This love is killin me  
But you're the only one  
It's not over_

---

Quentin walked into school with his sweatshirt hood up and a blank look on his face. He was tired of life, tired of having things not go his way. For once he just wanted everyone to listen to him, he wanted to be noticed.

His hands were in his sweatshirt pocket as he walked down the hall to the gym.

"hey Q, what are you doing here?" an ex-teammate and friend came up to him holding out his hand for a high five.

Quentin didn't have any friendly thoughts on his mind, nothing but hate and anger. He wouldn't take any crap from anyone and he wasn't going to be nice to his so called friend. His team didn't do anything to defend him, anything to make sure he was ok.

"Get the hell away from me." Quentin pushed the boys hand away.

"whoa Q, whats up?" the rest of the team started walking over to see what the commotion was.

"Back off!" he shouted as he pulled out a gun and shot it into the air.

**A/N: So how did it go?? I know I'm mean I left you with a cliffy, but I promise you there will be more of the shooting in the next chapter!! So yes, it is finally here. Please if you liked it or have anything at all to say, please review!!**

**So you know my other story that I couldn't write?? Maybe not, anyways I have been thinking up and even started writing another story that has some similar story lines but it is AU. Of course there is Lucas and Peyton in it….and that's all I'm gonna say. Will you pm or tell me in a review if you are interested?? Cause I really wanna see if I have any support yet…. Even before I start posting.**

**Anyways, how has everyone been while I was gone???**

**Thank you!**

**EM**

**P.S. special thanks to Fairy T bird aka tweetiebird, couldn't have done it without you!**


	6. The Reason

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N:so there was something going wrong with fanfiction for a little bit so this woulda come sooner but I couldn't get it up…..please review, this is a big one for me! I really would've gotten this sooner if it was available!!**

**uh so yeah it's finally here!! Haha you ready for the big moment.**

**Chapter 6: The Reason: Hoobastank**

_I'm not a perfect person  
There are many things I wish I didn't do  
But I continue learning  
I never meant to do those things to you  
And so I have to say before I go  
That I just want you to know_

Lucas sat in his office at Tree Hill High. You could probably guess that he was brooding.

He had to come into work alone today; Nathan and Skills were going to a basketball game.

He had done a lot of thinking lately and he came to the conclusion that he wasn't the man he wanted to be. He changed and he was not proud of that. He wanted to take back all the wrongs in his life, he wanted to go back in time and change everything. But that's life for you; you only have one chance and there is no time for regrets. All that he could hope for was the future. He wanted to make everything right; to cancel out all of his wrongs. He was going to start by being there for his team like he always should've been; be the coach that whitey taught him how to be. Next he was going to fix things with his family and then he was going to fight for Peyton no matter how hard it would be.

It may seem like you have all the time in the world but that isn't always true. For tomorrow isn't a promise but a chance. With that you can do whatever you want.

His head shot up when he heard the sound of a gun go off. He slowly walked over to the blind covered window that looked out into the gym. He hesitantly used his pointer finger to moved one of the blinds away to look into the gym.

---

"Q!" his teammate Michael shouted in fear. "what the hell are you doing?" he asked, you could hear the fear in his voice. He never expected Quentin to act this way.

Other members of the team started to back away instantly as they saw the rage in Quentin's eyes.

"Q, settle down man." Another teammate David said shakily.

Quentin let the gun down to his side and laughed without humor. "now you care what I'm up to?" The confused looks from the team he laughed again. "you guys are unbelievable."

---

Lucas quietly backed away from the window. He couldn't believe what he just saw. Never in his life did he imagine encountering another school shooting. He didn't catch a glimpse of the shooter but he could see some of the fear displayed on the faces of his team.

Not thinking very much he walked over to the door but before he opened it a ton of thoughts ran through his head; what if I don't make this is as bad as it was with Jimmy? What if one of his players gets shot or he does? What if he doesn't make it? What will happen to his family?

There was one certain blonde that also stuck in his head.

"Peyton." He said under his breath.

_I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
and the reason is you_

He knew that he had to go out there. He knew that he couldn't leave the players out there with a gunman. But he also knew that if something bad happened, he didn't know if he would ever get to tell Peyton the things he wanted to; needed to.

He walked over to his desk and took out a piece of paper and grabbed a pen sitting in a Ravens mug on his desk. He began to write a letter to Peyton. He was a freaking writer so he better be able to put the right words on paper. Once he finished he took out something from his pocket and slipped it in the envelope. After he sealed it and wrote Peyton in a blue permanent marker on the envelope.

He stood up, but before he walked to the door he walked to the phone.

"Principle Turner, the school needs to go on lockdown, there is a shooter in the gym." Without anymore words he hung up the phone and hesitantly walked to the door.

---

(keep in mind I have no idea how this goes, so sorry if I screw it up!)

Haley sat in her English class, getting ready for the next set of kids to come in. There were a bunch of kids rushing into the room and kids running everywhere out in the halls. Some into classrooms and some out of the school.

She had no idea what was going on until she saw several people from the office running around frantically telling everyone the school is going on lockdown. Since they knew he was in the gym they went out into the halls to tell everybody. Over the intercom was far more risky.

"whats going on?" Haley asked one of the teachers that was running by.

"there is a shooter in the gym, you need to lock your door." He said frantically.

Her eyes widened in shock when she heard the word shooter. She immediately let the last kids in and shut the door and locked it. She turned around and put her back on the door and slid down it, tears running down her face. Never did she think that there would be another shooting in the same high school. She looked around at the fifteen kids in her classroom and saw the fear and confusion in their faces. This was one of the worst things that could happen to a teenager.

---

Peyton drove up the driveway to Nathan and Haley's house. She sort of wanted to talk to Nathan about something. She was planning on confronting Lucas soon but she was still a little unsure of herself. Those insecurities creeping in every time they had a chance.

_I'm sorry that I hurt you  
It's something I must live with everyday  
And all the pain I put you through  
I wish that I could take it all away  
And be the one who catches all your tears  
Thats why i need you to hear_

She walked up to the door and knocked lightly. When there wasn't an answer she turned around to walk away but was stopped by the sound of the door opening.

"skinny girl." Skills said sadly. You could hear the fear and guilt in his frantic voice.

This didn't go unnoticed by Peyton. "what happened?" she said immediately and she walked back up the steps.

"come inside." He said softly as he moved out of the way so she could walk in.

With hesitance and confusion she slowly walked into the house to see Jamie playing with his matchbox cars in the corner and Nathan sitting on the couch with his head in his hands and a cell phone to his ear. Jamie took many glances over to his dad and a worried expression crossed his face.

"Haley…" Nathan spoke into the phone. "…are you safe?" He sat there waiting for a response. "that's all I wanted to hear." He said somewhat relieved.

"_Nathan you don't understand!" Haley was at her desk quietly talking to Nathan. "the shooter is in the gym, who else is in the fucking gym?"_

"Lucas." He breathed as his eyes widened and worry crossed his face.

"whats going on?" Peyton stepped in and shouted.

---

He began to walk to the door when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He stopped in his tracks and reached into his pocket, the caller ID read Haley James Scott.

"Haley I can't talk right now. All I can say is that I love you and tell everyone else that. I don't mean to sound dramatic but I'm being serious." He didn't let her utter a word. "you're the best friend someone can have, I love you Haley James Scott." He hung up the phone and walked over to the door and placed his hand on the door knob.

He looked up to the ceiling.

_I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
and the reason is You_

"dear God, please keep me and my team safe. Help us all get through this no matter what happens. And…" He swallowed. "…don't be too hard on the shooter, he doesn't know what he is doing. Amen." He seemed to be praying a lot lately. It's ironic how people only go to God when there is something going wrong in their life; that's not all he is good for. Sometimes you simply just have to thank him for giving you another day.

He turned the knob and stepped out of his office.

---

"what's going on?" Peyton asked again when all she got was looks from both Skills and Nathan but no response.

"Peyton…" Nathan stood up and walked over to her.

She pushed him away. "just tell me what is wrong Nathan, I'm not a child, I can handle it." She sent an quick apologetic glance towards Jamie. She then focused her attention back to Nathan and she looked him dead in the eye.

"come here." He pulled her hand and walked her towards the kitchen. "Skills can you watch Jamie for a little bit." He passed an earnest look towards Skills when Skills agreed.

Once in the kitchen Nathan took a deep breath. There was no way of not noticing the fear and sadness in his face.

"Nathan, you can talk to me." Peyton just wanted to know what was going on.

"Peyton, there is a shooter at Tree Hill High." Nathan frantically let out as he looked away from her eyes and pulled her in for a hug. It wasn't that she needed one, yet, but more that he needed one.

Her eyes widened. Thoughts of senior year flowed into her head. She remembered being scared inside the library, not thinking she was going to make it. She remembered feeling relief when Lucas found her; Lucas. She pulled away and looked to Nathan.

"where is Lucas?" she let out quietly. She could hardly find her voice.

A tear slipped down Nathan's face. "He is at the high school." He took a deep breath and made sure he had Peyton's attention. She looked at him waiting for more. "In the gym where the shooter is."

Peyton's face quickly turned into one of fear and worry. She shook her head. "no, you are supposed to say he is safe!" Peyton suddenly shouted. Nathan moved forward quickly and brought her into a hug before she could fall. "Nathan, he supposed to be safe, he isn't supposed to be the one in danger." She cried as tears rolled down her face. This couldn't be happening; everything was finally starting to fit together like an almost perfect puzzle; almost.

"I know, I know." He whispered in her hear. "He would be safe in his office, but you know that's not Lucas' way." When he heard a whimper escape her mouth he hugged her tighter. "he is a good man, and you know he always wants to do the right thing; he has to try and save his team."

"daddy." Jamie ran into the kitchen, Skills not far behind.

"sorry dawg, he tricked me." Skills apologized as he walked into the kitchen to retrieve Jamie.

Nathan and Peyton pulled away when they heard the little boy. "what's wrong with uncle Lucas? Who isn't safe?" he asked innocently.

---

He walked towards the gym. At first he held his head low; fearful.

_I'm not a perfect person  
I never meant to do those things to you  
And so I have to say before I go  
That I just want you to know  
_

When he heard more screams from his team and the thought of his family; he lifted his head and a boost of courage blasted throughout him.

_I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
and the reason is you_

He finally reached the gym and he stepped into the sight of all of his team and one other person.

"Quentin." He breathed out as the identity of the shooter was now known. Everyone in the gym turned to the voice that just spoke, for when that single name was spoken the gym became quiet.

"well whaddya know, it's the coach of the year!" Quentin shouted. "Coach Lucas Scott!" he smiled evilly and started to walk forward. "so you were hiding out this whole time! Why did you finally decide to show?" he asked, walking more towards Lucas, making sure his gun was well on display.

"Quentin this isn't you." He said honestly. His eyes barring into Quentin's.

"you don't know me!" he shouted angrily. "you never knew me." He glared at Lucas. "you were never the coach you promised you would be, never!" his voice rising with every word that he spoke.

"I know I wasn't." Lucas said sadly, bravely taking a step forward. "and I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." He looked around to each of his players, making sure they knew that he was referring to all of them.

"Well it's a little late for apologies isn't it." Quentin stated in a calm but slightly angered voice.

"It's never too late, if I have learned anything; it's that it's never too late." Lucas said vehemently.

"for my life…" He looked to Lucas with a certain fire in his eyes; definitely not the good kind. "…it is too late." He started to bring the gun up again.

---

Nathan, Peyton and Skills all arrived at the high school. They called Mouth and asked him to watch Jamie. After many agreements and promises he finally agreed to watch him.

"Haley!" Nathan shouted as he spotted his wife standing behind a wall of cop cars. She turned around and a breath of relief escaped her lips. She ran to him, more tears slipping down her cheeks.

"Nathan, I'm so glad you're here." She hugged him tightly and placed her head in the crook of his neck.

After about an hour the police and swat team entered the school quietly and slowly. They helped all the other classrooms escape the school when they declared that there was only one and he was located in the gym.

"Peyton." Haley said under her breath when she pulled away from Nathan.

She looked at Haley sadly not wanting anymore tears to fall. That failed when a new batch of tears seeped through her eyes. Haley quickly walked over to her friend and enveloped her in a big hug.

"He needs to be safe Hales." Her head was resting on Haley's shoulder. "I need him to be safe; I love him." she whispered in her ear.

_I've found a reason to show  
A side of me you didn't know  
A reason for all that I do  
And the reason is you_

**A/N: ok I know I'm kinda mean, I haven't really finished the whole shooting yet….but I didn't really want to fit it all in one chapter…but I hope this chapter was ok!!**

**Please if you read this review, because they help so much. Honestly it motivates and excites me so much!**

**I'm sorta in the process of writing a new one, I don't know when I'll post it but I am writing a new one….**

**Thanks for the reviews and reading!!**

**Em**

**P.S. much thanks to my Fairy T-Bird, you rock my socks off!! Oh and many thanks to my wonderful readers!!**


	7. Bullet

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N: so this definitely isn't the end, but it's a pretty big chapter!! Haha I hope you enjoy. Please review at the end!!**

**Chapter 7: Bullet: Mat Kearney **

_Yesterday I was sitting. recalling. reminiscing  
Trying to remember whenever there was nobody listening  
Before the hugging and the kissing, the booing and the hissing  
All I had was just a vision,  
All I had was my ambition  
Your love without condition  
Kept me swinging when I'm missing  
My eyes upon the prize  
Kept me striving for the mission  
When I was down for the count, falling out of commission  
I can hear you voice now screaming out "son, listen"  
Get on up, don't give up, though you struck opposition  
Time to buck all that stuff, find out what's you condition  
Like a pull in my soul, like keys in my ignition  
Call you all my commission, my love and my vision and..._

Can a call change your life? The truth is yes. It can be a call from your Grandma, saying that Grandpa doesn't have much time left. It could be a call from a college explaining that they would love to have you play for their sports team with a full ride scholarship. It could be a call from a seventh grade traveling basketball coach telling you that you made the B team. It could be your aunt calling to tell you that they found cancer in your uncle; everything is supposed to be ok, but you didn't ever see what was coming next; the part where you can't do anything to help. A phone call can change your life in many ways, in what way we will never know until we get the call.

For Nathan Scott the call from Haley was one of the scariest things of his life. He heard the word shooter and his thoughts came to the worst possible scenario. _Is Haley ok? Oh God I can't live without Haley. Who is the shooter? What can I do to help?_ Then he found out that Haley was fine, _oh thank God_, it was his brother that was in trouble; _No, not my brother, not him. _The call went from fear to relief to fear again. He never wanted to receive that call.

Sure his older brother had made countless mistakes and he hated the way that he treated Peyton. But that didn't mean he didn't love him and care for him. It's moments like these that you realize just how much that person means to you.

It had been two hours; two whole hours that Quentin had been in the gym with the gun; two whole hours of agonizing pain, every mom and loved one waiting for their son or daughter to come out of the school. But most of the school had been evacuated, so some relief passed by the eyes of the ones that had the grace of God over their heads. Then there were the basketball players that were still in there, trapped along with their coach, no one having a clue what was going on. Two hours; Two hours that felt like a lifetime.

"Peyton!" She turned her head to the very familiar voice and instantly stood up from her spot on the curb on one of the medians in the parking lot.

"Brooke." She breathed out. She ran closer until she was able to be embraced by her best friend. "I'm so glad you're here." Peyton said into Brooke's shoulder.

"this is where I need to be." Brooke was on her way to the airport to go to New York for a meeting for Clothes Over Bros. She pulled back and was about to ask how Peyton was, but held her tongue; obviously that was not an appropriate question to ask right now. She didn't know what else to say, what else to do; she didn't really know back then either.

Peyton read the words from her eyes. "how did this happen again Brooke?"

---

"I can't just sit here Haley." Nathan stood up from his place. Haley stood up quickly and grabbed his arm.

"we have to, there is nothing else we can do." She said sternly. She was hurting too, she wanted nothing more than to find a way to help Lucas, but she couldn't; there was nothing she could do and that killed her inside.

"I can't sit here Haley!" he yelled aggravated. He looked to the school and for a moment he was whisked back to senior year. He convinced Lucas to go in, he convinced himself to go in. The image of Lucas tackling him to the ground came to his head.

This didn't go unnoticed by Haley. "no." her grasp on his arm tightened.

Nathan glared at Haley. "Haley." He said his voice full of determination.

"Don't you dare." She pulled his arm and brought him into her arms, holding on tight. "I know how much you want to save him, but you have more in your life than just you; what about Jamie, what about me?" she cried into his chest.

His face softened and he wrapped his arms around Haley securely letting her know that he wasn't going anywhere. He wanted to save Lucas, he wanted to do that so bad, but he also knew that he had a family now and he couldn't put Haley through that pain. He wasn't superman, that was Lucas' job.

_It doesn't matter if they call me wrong  
Doesn't matter if they steal my song  
Doesn't matter if we're all alone_

_It doesn't matter at all_

---

Quentin brought up the gun and pointed it at Lucas. Flashes of everyone came before Lucas' eyes as he stared down the barrel of the gun. Quentin's hand was shaking as he held the gun in front of him.

_'Cause I would take a bullet for you  
I would take a bullet for you  
I would cross any line, I'd swim across the sea  
I would take a bullet for you  
I would take a bullet for you  
I would lose it all, I'd take my fall  
To show you it's for real_

The team, who were standing on the side of Lucas and Quentin, stood still and stared on with fear in their eyes. They had heard stories about Jimmy coming into the school and Nathan and Lucas going back into save people. They felt sorry for Jimmy and Keith and hearing those stories was sad, but as soon as they were finished a sense of relief washed over them knowing that that hadn't happened to them. Now, it was so different and they never imagined this ever happening to them.

"you don't have to do this." Lucas said as calm as he could, but everyone in the room heard the fear that laced his voice. "you're not this person."

Quentin put his head down and laughed. "and how would you know that?"

"Because I can see it in your eyes, and I know that you really don't want to do this." Yes he was scared, scared to death. He kept replaying the right words to say in his head to make sure he would do this right. He didn't get his chance with Jimmy, his chance to talk to him. But now he had the chance; the chance to talk to Quentin and stop him from making a big mistake.

"you're just saying that because you don't want me to blow your head off!" Quentin shouted and thrust the gun to the middle of Lucas' forehead.

Lucas' eyes traveled upward as he stared at the gun that was pressed against his forehead. Hesitantly he nodded slowly. "yeah, you're right." He squeezed his eyes shut. "but that doesn't mean I don't mean it too." He opened his eyes that had tears developing in them.

Lucas looked into Quentin's eyes. He saw that Quentin was trying to put on a brave face; a tough face, trying to convince everyone to fear him. But Lucas saw past that. He saw more than a fake face, he saw sadness, confusion, anger and regret; exactly what he was looking for, the regret in Quentin's eyes. He knew with the regret he saw in Quentin's eyes meant that there was a chance that they would all make it out of this.

---

_Remember when we used to flow together back in the park  
You would slang guitar licks under the stars in the dark  
You'd say let's grow together as this world falls apart  
I was holding on to hope but hardly holding a spark  
All the rhymes that I wrote you'd call dope from the start  
I'd be like a pure note. like a quote on the mark  
You'd go to every show and promote from the start  
From the beginning we've been building much more than this art  
Remember bearing scars in you car to impart you heart  
You cared enough to call my bluff through the junk from the start  
That's why you're holding onto half of my heart  
You've been there through the times,  
Through the nights that were dark and....  
_

"why aren't they going in there!" Peyton shouted frustrated. "they know where the shooter is, they can go in there." Peyton knew why they couldn't, but she just needed something to shout; something to get out because the silence was killing her. She walked over to a police man and grabbed his shoulder. "why the Hell aren't you doing anything!" she started to shove him into the car while he looked on in a with fright. "you should be in there trying to get him out; trying to get my Lucas out!" tears started to fall from her eyes. She felt a pair of strong arms circle around her and begin to pull her away. She reluctantly let go of the police man as she heard the masculine voice behind her whisper a sorry to the man.

"Peyton." Nathan turned her around in his arms and embraced her in a tight caring hug. Peyton instantly put her face into his chest and began to cry.

"I can't stand not knowing if he is ok or not." She let a sob escape her throat.

"I know." He leaned his head on her head and his right hand rubbed up and down on her back. "but Peyton, you can't just automatically think the worst, we don't know for sure if anything has happened."

She nodded against him and pulled away. "I just feel so guilty." Her eyes looked anywhere else but Nathan.

"Peyton." He said sternly to get her attention. She slowly brought her gaze back to his. "why would you feel guilty? You haven't done anything wrong."

"He told me he loved me."

He looked at her surprised but once he realized that he hadn't said anything for a while he broke from his daze and spoke. "I mean that's a big deal Peyton, but what does this have to do with anything?"

She took a deep breath, trying to hold in the tears that threatened to fall any minute. "I didn't say anything back." A few tears slid down her face while she waited for him to say something. "I mean I do love him, of course I do." It was almost as if she was speaking to herself. "but I didn't say it back because I didn't want to give into my want. If I told him I loved him I would have crawled right back into his arms." She groaned in frustration, anger, and sadness towards Lucas. "I didn't want to crawl back into his arms right away; I didn't think I wanted to do it ever!" She turned her gaze back to Nathan to make sure he was still there, he hadn't said a word. "I wanted him to feel…feel the pain that I felt when he left. I didn't want to give in and have him be happy. He hurt me so bad and I just wasn't ready." She sighed in exhaustion and combed a hand through her golden locks. "and now I'd do anything to take that day back; I would do anything to have it so I told him I loved him back. To just be in his safe arms again." She looked down and her feet and shook her head, more tears slipping from her eyes. "I don't know if I'll ever be able to tell him I love him again." She looked back up to meet Nathan's sincere gaze.

His heart broke for his friend. She looked so sad and broken. He just wanted everything to be ok again. Sometimes people say 'I know' when they really don't. But Nathan, he knew exactly how she felt. He was in the exact same position at the last school shooting; not knowing if Haley was ok or not. It was a horrible feeling not being able to protect the ones you love.

---

It was so hard being there, being in the gym; all the fear and confusion that encased everyone's mind. It was something that no one should ever have to experience.

It was starting to get hot and sweat started to build up on his face. He was breathing hard, trying control it. With everything going on lately many things slipped his mind. One in particular being his heart pills; he hadn't taken them this morning.

Many thoughts ran through his head; thoughts of his family and friends, his team, all the 'what if's'. A wave of determination washed through him. He had to get everyone out of here, he had to help Quentin. All these things seemed so far out of reach, so hard to accomplish; but he knew he had to try. He had to try because he wanted to be the man he always wanted to be and this is what he would do. He wasn't happy with himself; lying to Lindsey, hurting Peyton, shutting his family and friends out. He hadn't been the man he always promised himself he would be.

He was doing this for them; for his family, for Peyton. He was doing this so he could finally start over and so people would believe that he had changed.

_It doesn't matter if they call me wrong  
Doesn't matter if they steal my song  
Doesn't matter if we're all alone  
It doesn't matter at all _

He looked to Quentin and slowly brought his hand up towards his forehead; praying to God that Quentin would not pull that trigger. He placed his hand on the gun and slowly pushed it away, never once taking his gaze away from Quentin.

_'Cause I would take a bullet for you  
I would take a bullet for you  
I would cross any line, I'd swim across the sea  
I would take a bullet for you  
I would take a bullet for you  
I would lose it all, I'd take my fall  
To show you it's for real  
_

Quentin hadn't done anything. He stood in place and didn't use any of his strength to keep the gun in place. He just watched as Lucas moved the gun away. He didn't know why, but he didn't do anything to protest or fight against Lucas.

Once the gun was down by Quentin's side again, with Lucas still holding it, he tried to pull it away but Quentin's grip remained.

"you don't want to do this." Lucas reasoned with him. "you need to let your team out of here.

Quentin shook his head slowly. "you don't get to decide for me and they are not my team."

"you've always been a part of this team." Lucas told him honestly. "you have always been a great player and a great teammate. You will always be a part of this team Quentin." Remorse filled his voice. "I'm sorry you were told that you couldn't play and I'm sorry that I wasn't here to help you. I would've done anything to help you, please believe that." He paused, keeping his eye on Quentin to see if he should be aware of any sudden movements. He tore his gaze away for a few moments to give his team a reassuring glance and then focused back on Quentin. "this isn't their fault, don't take it out on them. If anyone take it out on me, no one else deserves it and you know it."

_It doesn't matter if they call me wrong  
Doesn't matter if they steal my song  
Doesn't matter if we're all alone  
It doesn't matter at all_

After minutes of silence and no movement from Quentin, Lucas turned to his players. He hesitantly opened his mouth to say something but closed it. He looked to Quentin, his gaze was turned towards the wall where the retired jerseys were held. He turned back to his team.

"go." They all looked at him like that was the worst plan. He looked back to Quentin; his gaze was still on the wall. He knew that Quentin heard him so he took that as a sign.

"get out of here." He told them softly but his eyes told them to obey. The first player nodded slowly and hesitantly began to back up before he turned around and dashed for the door. The rest of the team soon followed.

---

The people's attention in the parking lot was quickly directed towards the loud footsteps that were coming from the school.

Police men came forward to meet all the teenage kids in Raven's uniforms to check them for guns or anything that would be unsafe. Once they were checked over they ran to meet their waiting parents in the parking lot.

The Sheriff walked over to one of the players. Peyton, Nathan, Haley, Brooke and Skills were close by but walked closer so they could hear.

"son, I need to talk to you." The Sheriff said sternly but softly because he knew what was happening was very traumatizing.

The boy nodded.

"are you guys all evacuated, is there anyone else?"

Peyton and Nathan and everyone else listened very intently.

The boy shook his head from side to side. "Coach is still in there with Quentin Fields, the shooter."

More questions were asked but Nathan tuned them all out as he looked at Skills in shock.

"Quentin." He said under his breath.

Peyton started to cry along with Brooke and Haley as they all held each other and said silent prayers.

---

"why did you let them go?" Lucas asked after minutes of silence. Quentin's gaze was still on the wall. Lucas could have ran but he didn't; he couldn't.

"what?" Quentin turned to Lucas.

"you let them go because you knew that this…" he motioned to the gun, "…isn't you. You let them go because you didn't want to hurt them, because you care for them."

"stop it." Quentin didn't want to give in now, he didn't want to stop what he started but he found himself caving.

"why else would you let them go? You let them go Q, you're a good man and I know that you didn't want to do this, that you don't want to do this." Lucas moved closer to him and Quentin's eyes bore into his. "It's not too late."

Quentin looked to the gun in his hands. "you don't know that."

"I do! It's not too late; you have a whole life ahead of you!" Lucas found his voice getting louder. "you can fix your life; it's not too late." Lucas walked even closer to Quentin. He wasn't going to leave without getting through to him. "what would your dad want you to do?" he said hesitantly and with breaks in his voice.

"don't you talk about him!" Quentin held up the gun with his sudden burst of anger and sadness at the thought of his father.

"what would he want you to do Q?! Think about him!"

"I let my father down, I am the reason he is dead!" he was shaking now and the hand that held the gun was unsteady. He pointed it at the wall and shot, the bullet went right into the jersey of Dan Scott.

---

The gun fire startled everyone outside and they jumped slightly.

"we need to get in there." The Sheriff declared.

Nathan and Skills gave each other a look and started to run in the direction of the school.

"no!" They were stopped by Brooke who ran ahead. "you need to stay here. We don't need all of you getting hurt. I know you want to save him, I know you do but you need to stay." She said sadly as tears built up in her eyes.

Skills settled down and walked over to Brooke to pull her in for a hug. "I'm here baby girl."

Peyton stood shocked in her place. She tried to pull her thoughts from the worst scenario but it got harder and harder. The gunshot kept going off inside her head.

---

"my father died a long time ago. I never really knew him and he was never there for me." Lucas stared at the glass and frame that stood shattered on the floor of the gym. "but your father, he loved you and he wanted the best for you." He looked back to Quentin who was crying and shaking. "It isn't your fault. He doesn't blame you, you know he would be proud of you for whatever accomplishment you make in your life. You need to forgive yourself." He paused and Quentin looked up to meet his eyes. "ask yourself, is this what he would have wanted for you?"

Tears began to fall faster and faster from Quentin's eyes. " I just wish he was here." Lucas gave him a sad look and he began to walk closer but stopped in his tracks when the doors slammed open.

"put the gun down!" shouted a member of the SWAT team.

Quentin's eyes glared at the people who just entered. A wave of fear and regret washed over him. He became so frightened. He held up the gun towards them but wasn't going to fire, it was just out of defense.

One of the men pointed his gun and was about to pull the trigger.

Lucas watched as this happened in slow motion. He was just getting through to Quentin, and this boy mattered so much to him. His family flashed through his eyes again; Lily and Jamie playing at the park that he took them too; sitting at a family dinner at the Scott's house; picking his mom up at the airport; seeing Peyton smiling up on the stage of Tric. He loved them, every single one of them. But he also loved Quentin and he had the regret and shame of hurting the people he loved on his shoulders.

_It doesn't matter if they call me wrong  
Doesn't matter if they steal my song  
Doesn't matter if we're all alone  
It doesn't matter at all_

He took a deep breath and said a prayer before he moved.

"Quentin!" he shouted out just as the man pulled the trigger. Lucas jumped in front of Quentin and put his arms up in front of him. His body jerked as a bullet strikes him and he falls into Quentin.

_'Cause I would take a bullet for you  
I would take a bullet for you  
I would cross any line, I'd swim across the sea  
I would take a bullet for you  
I would take a bullet for you  
I would lose it all, I'd take my fall  
To show you it's for real_

"coach." Quentin caught him in his arms. "come on, you gotta stay here ok." He looked down and met Lucas gaze. "you can't take that bullet for me, it's not made for you."

"its not yours either."

Quentin let some tears fall and he stood up and pulled the gun up and began to fire. "son of a Bitch!" he yelled.

It wasn't long before the men reacted and began to fire back. It didn't stop until Quentin fell to the ground, his last look going to Lucas; saying he was sorry that his choices ended up with this situation and that he was thankful for Lucas.

**A/N: so was it worth the wait?? I know maybe that's not how you were expecting it, but did you like it anyways? What did you think of everyone in it?? Please review and let me know how you liked it or didn't like it, whatever just let me know cause this is a big chapter!!**

**Em**


	8. Hanging By a Moment

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N: thanks for reading and reviewing. I know updates aren't that much but I try to get one every weekend. It's just hard during the week with school, and I have rugby now too!! Haha it's so much fun you should try it.**

**Chapter 8: Hanging By a Moment: Lifehouse**

Time; a factor that affects everything. The time it takes to cook a hot pocket: about 2-3 minutes. The time of an average TV show: one hour. Time it takes to get from Minnesota to Hawaii: about 9 hours. The time it takes for one moment to change the rest of your life: unknown; but it can come and go faster than we ever expected.

_I'm desperate for changing  
Starving for truth  
I'm closer to where I started  
I'm chasing after you _

Peyton's shot up from the spot on the ground as soon as the first gun shot went off. She waited anxiously for any sort of movement, any sort of noise to give her a clue to what was going on. The noise that came next is the exact noise she didn't want to hear; more gunshots. Somewhere in the midst of the gunshots she heard two men down through the walkie talkie that was sitting on the belt of one of the police officers.

"get the medics in there!" one of them shouted.

"Lucas." She said sadly under her breath. That was all Peyton needed to hear, she moved swiftly as she ran to towards the school.

"Peyton!" Nathan shouted after her. He turned to Haley, silently asking her if he could go.

"go." She nodded, worry scrawled on her face.

Without another word he began to run after her.

"I'm sorry Miss, you can't cross this line." A man shouted as he saw her running towards him.

That didn't stop her, she pushed him out of the way roughly and ran as fast as she could, Nathan not far behind.

---

Time seemed to move in slow motion, yet it all seemed to go so fast.

His eyes met Quentin's for a brief moment. They were filled with a mix of emotions; anger, sadness, guilt, anticipation, thankfulness. Lucas saw all this. Quentin was angry and sad about his life; what had happened in it and all the problems he had to go through. He felt guilty for things ending up the way that they were. He was anticipating his last breath, but was so thankful that Lucas was there for him in his last moments.

That is what Lucas had wanted all along; to break Quentin's shell, make him realize that there was a place in this world for him. He just wished that Quentin could live to see the rest of his life. That part is what Lucas failed in. Quentin didn't get to keep is life, and Lucas didn't get to help him through it.

Tears sprung to his eyes as he let all those thoughts encase him. He never wanted this for Quentin, he never meant for it to ever turn out this way. Maybe if he would've just been at practice more, been there for Quentin, this would've never happened.

Quentin's eyes closed and his chest stopped rising and falling. There were no more movements, no more sounds, and no more breaths. That is when Lucas knew, it was the end.

---

He didn't know what was happening. He turned over onto his stomach and started to cough up blood. It became harder and harder to breath, it was like all the air at been sucked from his lungs. He was slowly fading.

She reached the gym and didn't hesitate to walk through the doors. She stopped in her tracks at the sight of him. Her heart stopped as she saw him cough up blood and squirm in pain. "Lucas!" Peyton screamed. She rushed across the gym, past all the police men and SWAT. She tuned everything out, all she saw was him. "Lucas." She shouted every couple of seconds as she grew closer and closer to him.

Once she reached him she slowly bent down. This was all such a shock and it hurt to see him in this kind of pain, all the blood around him.

"Lucas." The tears started to take over as she hesitantly grabbed a hold of his body. He turned over with a fearful look on his face. He was struggling to get air into his lungs, but it wasn't working. "Lucas." She cried again.

He looked up to meet her eyes.

_I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all i've held onto  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you_

Blue met green. She stared back at him with tear filled eyes. Tears slowly began to fall from his eyes. They closed.

"no, no Lucas you have to stay with me ok." She moved her arms away to pull off her jacket and she placed it where her hand was previously resting over his wound. The pressed in a little and he shuttered. "I know, I know it hurts." She leaned her head down on his Chest. More tears started to fall as she looked at the blood. There was so much blood. "you have to keep this beating ok, keep this beating for me." Her head was rested over his heart, it didn't sound right. No, it didn't sound how it was supposed to.

She felt him start to give out.

"no, baby no ok." She cried as she lifted her head up to look at his face. "you have to hang in there, you have to baby."

Nathan came running in and as soon as he spotted them his face fell into one of horror. "Lucas." He said under his breath and he took off into the gym.

_Forgetting all I'm lacking  
Completely incomplete  
I'll take your invitation  
You take all of me now_

Lucas reached his hand up to her cheek slowly. He wanted to get her attention. She looked into his eyes. He tried to get the words out but they wouldn't come. So he just stared into her eyes, telling her everything that she needed to know; that he loved her.

"I love you so much Lucas." She sobbed and grabbed his face with her one hand that wasn't holding him. "I love you baby, I promise." She leaned her head against his forehead.

_  
I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all i've held onto  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you _

"you have to stay with me, you can't leave me Luke." Tears fell onto his face and he squeezed his eyes shut. It hurt so much to see her cry; he didn't want to see her cry anymore. Their eyes were only inches away from each other. He reached his lips up and kissed her lips. He gave her one last glance before he couldn't handle it anymore, he had to let go.

_  
I'm living for the only thing i know  
I'm running and not quite sure where to go  
And I don't know what I'm diving into  
Just hanging by a moment here with you_

---

"Lucas." She shook him lightly. She was hoping with all her heart that he was just closing his eyes. She grabbed his lifeless hand. "Lucas." She shook him again a little fiercer. "Lucas." The tears that had stopped suddenly started again. "please baby, don't give up on me."

Nathan came over and saw Quentin on the ground. Tears sprung to his eyes, this wasn't supposed to happen again. No one should ever have to go through this. When he heard Peyton's sobs he quickly went to her side, remembering Lucas.

"Peyton." Nathan knelt down next to her with tears in his eyes. He laid a hand on her shoulder. She jumped at his touch. "God Luke." He looked down at his brother. More tears filled his eyes as he noticed the blood.

"come on baby, don't give up." She sobbed as she rocked him back in forth.

"Peyton." He tried to pull her away. This was not the best thing for her to be here.

The medics came in with stretchers and the police men came rushing into the gym.

"Sir, we need you to move out of the gym please." One of them stated toward Nathan.

"Peyt come on." Nathan tried to lift her up.

"don't call me that!" she lashed out, not taking her gaze off of Lucas.

"Peyton, they need to get Lucas to the hospital, you need to let go." He grabbed her hand and when the medics lifted Lucas off of her lap, he pulled her up. She was still grasping his hand tightly.

"I don't want to let go, I will never let go." He realized what she meant; she wasn't ever going to let go of her love for him, she was always going to hold onto it.

"I know Peyton, but we need to get out of here." He sucked in a hard breath and held in tears, he needed to be strong right now. "we need to get you cleaned up."

They pulled Lucas away and her hand slowly came out of Lucas grasp.

---

Haley, Brooke and Skills stood outside waiting to see what was happening.

"Oh my God." Haley put her hand to her mouth as she saw a closed up body bag on a stretcher being rolled out. "no." she sobbed. She didn't know who it was, but she cried for that person; cried for what was happening to every student in the school.

Brooke walked over and wrapped her arms around Haley, crying into her shoulder.

"Nathan, Peyton." Skills shouted as he began to walk towards the blonde and brunette coming out of the school.

Haley and Brooke looked up and they too ran over to meet their good friends.

"Peyton." Brooke saw the blood on Peyton's clothes. It seems everyone was calling by her real name at this moment.

Everyone's eyes widened at the sight behind the two, medics running towards them with Lucas on the stretcher.

"No." Haley shook her head and the tears began to fall harder.

"Luke." Skills began to run over to meet them, but were quickly pushed away by a police man.

"we have to get him to the hospital sir."

"Luke." A few tears came to his eyes. "come on Dawg."

"Brooke, can you take Peyton back to your house to get cleaned up?" Nathan asked softly

"yeah su-…" she was cut off by Peyton.

"not yet, I need to do something." She stepped out of Nathan's grasp and began to walk back towards the gym.

"Peyton." Nathan called after her.

She didn't turn around, she just kept walking; she felt it in her heart.

_  
There's nothing else to lose  
Nothing else to find  
There's nothing in the world  
That can change my mind  
There is nothing else  
There is nothing else_

---

She walked into Lucas' office, barely making a noise, even though no one was there. It was just one of those moments where things tend to be quiet.

She paused at the doorway, just staring at the room in front of her.

_She imagined him sitting at his desk, working on plays and seeing where to put certain players. She would come in on her lunch break (whenever she made it her lunch break) and lean against the door frame. Watch him looking intensely down at his play book, the sun shining in from the window hitting his face in the most perfect way. She would say 'Hey coach' and he would look up and give her a big cheeky grin. He would reply back with 'Hey Blondie'. She would then walk over to him and sit on his lap._

She walked over and sat in his desk chair.

_She would wrap her arms around her neck and he would wrap his arms around her waist in a tight embrace._

She placed her elbows on the desk and rested her chin on her hands, a sad smile gracing her lips.

_She would whisper 'I love you' and he would say 'I love you more' and then she would smile and give him a nice tender kiss on the lips._

Her smile drifted away as she was woken from her reverie. That is how it would've gone, if things weren't so messed up, if she just said yes; if he would've waited forever for her. But it doesn't always go as planned and we just have to learn to live with that.

She looked down at his desk, running her hand over the few pictures he had. A picture of Jamie; one of Nathan and Haley. The last one surprised her; it was a picture of them. She immediately noticed the letter with 'Peyton' written on it, sitting not too far away from the picture.

She picked it up with wonderment. She ran her thin fingers over the hand writing that she knew all too well. _Should I open it?_ She thought to herself. It was written to her and in her heart she just felt like she was supposed to. So she opened it and slowly unfolded the piece of paper. Once opened, she glanced at the paper filled with his writing and before she even started reading, tears sprang to her eyes.

_Dear Blondie,_

_I hope you got this letter, because if these words are the last words I get to say, or I guess 'write', I want you to read these ones._

_I heard the gunshot and stood up to go see what was happening, but something flashed before my eyes. It was you; I thought about what the consequences would be if I went out there and when it came down it, the most important reason was you. I had to write to you and tell you the things I never got to say._

_I love you; I'm in love with you._

_It can be as simple as that, but it's not. It's so much more than that. You will never know how much I love you, how much I need you, how much I want you. I realized not too long ago that you are my forever, my everything, my soul mate, my one and only. But I let you get away, I let you get away without a fight, and I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that I didn't keep my promise. But I just want you to know that you are the only one who has my heart and I love you with all my heart._

_I want you forever, for the rest of my life, till my last breath, but you know what? That still wouldn't be enough. If you lived to be 100, I would want to live to be 90 and 364 days so I would never have to spend a day without you._

_If somebody asks whose life is more important, yours or mine, I'm going to be selfish and say mine. They'll look at me like I'm the sickest man alive, but what they don't realize is that you are my life._

_True Love Always and Forever,_

_Lucas _

_P.S. If I'm not there to help, take care of my heart, because it's yours. I know I left it in good hands._

She finished the letter with tears streaming down her face and soft sobs escaping her throat. She told herself that she wouldn't let his words affect her or mean anything to her, but these words change everything. She could see him writing this, see him saying these exact words to her if he were here right now.

_I'm desperate for changing  
Starving for truth  
I'm closer to where I started  
I'm chasing after you_

_I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held onto  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you_

---

Nathan, Haley, Skills, and Mouth were at the hospital. Jamie was even there, they felt that he should know, and be able to be there for his uncle just as much as the rest of them. Jamie was sitting by his mom, holding her hand. He had Lucas' 'Keith Body Shop' sweatshirt on, it was way too big, but he didn't care.

Skills noticed Nathan's face, it looked like he was about to break down. Nathan was holding Haley who had just stopped crying and was laying on his chest with her arms wrapped around him.

"hey Jamie, let's go get a snack, ok buddy?" Skills suggested, giving a look to Mouth to come along. He wanted to give Haley and Nathan some time alone. Nathan gave him a thankful look.

As soon as they left Nathan stood up, slowly moving Haley from his body. He stood up and walked over to the opposite wall, leaning his back up against it.

Haley watched in confusion, waiting for something to happen. It wasn't long before tears sprung to Nathan's eyes and he slowly slid to the floor. Sobs wracked his body as he sat there, looking like a lost boy.

"Nathan." Haley said sadly as she walked over and tried to wrap her arms around him.

He stood up from the ground, pulling away from Haley. "It's all my fault Hales, I could've stopped it." He cried.

"Nathan." She stood up. "now is not the time to play the blame game." She said softly but with strength in her voice.

He shook his head and shrugged her off before he walked away out of the hospital.

---

After she showered and was a cleaned up, which took about twenty minutes, she made Brook rush to the hospital. But Brooke was more than willing to go, Lucas was her friend too.

She hadn't said a word since she left Lucas' office. The letter was safely tucked into her jeans pocket. She had on a pair of jeans with holes in the knees, Lucas loved them, and a band t-shirt. Her hair was thrown in a messy bun and she didn't even bother with make-up, she knew that it would come right off with her tears.

_  
I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held onto  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you_

She walked in and sat in one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs. Shutting out and ignoring everything around her. She needed him to be ok; everyone needed him to be ok. Even if he had made mistakes and could be a total ass, they still loved and needed him.

_  
I'm living for the only thing I know  
I'm running and not quite sure where to go  
I don't know what i'm diving into  
Just hanging by a moment here with you_

She could only hope that it wasn't too late, that she wasn't too late. They truly did have the worst timing in the world.

__

Just hanging by a moment  
Hanging by a moment  
Hanging by a moment  
Hanging by a moment here with you

**A/N: I hope you enjoyed it!!!**

**I'm hanging by this moment for reviews…did that even make sense?? Ha oh well**

**Please review, I have seen the hits and stuff and I've gotten quite a bit. I don't mean to be greedy, cause I love you guys, but please if you read this story just at least review once! I like to know what people think!**

**PM me about any questions or something you would like to say!!**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing, I really appreciate it, it helps so much!**

**EM**


	9. Authors Note

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**Ok So I know I haven't updated in a while….and I'm really sorry, but I've honestly been really busy!!!**

**I've had school and rugby practice and finals and all that jazz along with piano and guitar. Tomorrow I leave for Hawaii so I have been packing and getting ready, that's why there has been no update.**

**I will not be able to update until about next Sunday or even after that. I am truly sorry that I will not be able to, but I didn't wanna just throw together a horrible rushed update.**

**Please take this into consideration and not be mad at me.**

**I hope you still read and review when I come back, I really don't want to lose readers!!!**

**And if you would let me know what you think of the story and maybe some reassurance that would be so totally awesome!! I will think about this story over break!!**

**Much love to all…**

**EM**

**Oh and if you want to know if Lucas lives or not…umm scroll down and you will see. And if this scroll thing doesn't work and it just pops up, sorry for those who didn't wanna know.**

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**Yes!! Of course he lives, I can't have him die!! He is the freaking main character and he is awesome and leyton has to happen!!!!!!!**


	10. Look After You

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N: so I'm back from break…it was fun and the reason I didn't update was because of vacation and a new term and I had my first rugby game and it didn't turn out so well…**

**Sorry its kind of shorter, but I hope it suits your liking.**

**Anyways I hope you enjoy!!**

**Chapter 9: Look After You: The Fray**

Four hours. Four hours it took for Lucas to be in surgery. The bullet was lodged into his side and it pierced his lung. He lost a lot of blood. His heart condition only made matters worse; he should've just taken his damn pills.

They hadn't gotten to see him yet. He was out of surgery but they still didn't know for sure if he was going to be ok. They did their job; they repaired his lung and retrieved the bullet from his body. Now that needed to heal and his heart needed to get better. He couldn't breathe on his own yet.

---

_  
If I don't say this now I will surely break  
As I'm leaving the one I want to take  
Forgive the urgency but hurry up and wait  
My heart has started to separate_

She wanted to tell him she loved him. She wanted to hold him in her arms and never let go. She wished that things were different; that she would've just talked to him, instead of avoiding him. But dammit he made it so hard. He hurt her so bad that she didn't want to fall in love again. But after this she realized something, she realized that you only live life once and in life you have to take risks.

She loved him, there was no doubt about that and now she was willing to take that risk; that chance at love again. It would've been easier if the situation was different, but maybe she needed this to realize what she needed to do; but why did it have to end up this way?

_Oh, oh, oh  
Oh, oh, oh  
Be my baby  
Oh, oh, oh  
I'll look after you_

"Family of Lucas Scott?" the doctor walked into the waiting room that was filled with who he assumed was connected to Lucas.

Nathan was staring off blankly, while Haley and Jamie slept next to him. Brooke was sitting next to Mouth, laying her head on his shoulder while Skills sat on the ground leaning against a wall; there were plenty of chairs, he just wanted the floor right now. Peyton was sitting in a chair, in her own thoughts, most of them about a certain blonde boy.

When the Doctor's voice was heard, everyone seemed to shoot up like the moles in a walk-a-mole game.

"yes." Nathan spoke up when no one else said anything.

---

"just breath Luke." Came the voice of someone familiar, but a voice that hadn't been heard in what seemed like forever.

He was lying on the floor of the gym. He looked to his side and Quentin was nowhere on the floor. He then took his gaze and followed the voice.

"Keith?" he asked in surprise and disbelief. The older man nodded as he held out a hand for Lucas to get up. He still had a disbelieving look on his face and he was so confused; what was going on?

"wh-what are you doing here?" Lucas asked hesitantly.

"I could ask you the same thing." Keith said with a slight chuckle and a little smile that hadn't been seen in a while.

"so this is it?" Lucas asked with a little bit of relief and sadness in his voice.

"yeah this is the Tree Hill gym, I thought you would've known that by now."

Lucas was silent. They both knew that's not what he was talking about.

"you know what I mean. This is what it's like? Being dead?" Lucas asked.

"I don't know. This isn't my usual hang out spot, but you could say this place is pretty nice." Lucas looked to the ground. "so what are you doing here?"

---

"yes." Nathan spoke.

"all of you?" he had a hard time believing that all these people that didn't look that much like Lucas would all be related.

"yes all of us." Nathan said sternly. The doctor gave him an unsure look. "you said family and we…" he motioned to everyone around, "are his family." All the eyes in the room were focused on the doctor.

"ok." The doctor nodded slowly. "well, we removed the bullet from his body and repaired his collapsed lung." The doctor stopped for a moment, letting all the information sink in before he went on. He noticed that some of the heads of the people in the room fell.

_There now, steady love, so few come and don't go  
Will you won't you, be the one I always know  
When I'm losing my control, the city spins around  
You're the only one who knows, you slow it down_

Peyton was still staring at the doctor. She wouldn't cry yet no, not till he finished. But she could let them start in her eyes right? Cause it was damn hard not to. They had to get the bullet out of him? Well she knew that, but when the doctor said it, it became reality and so much worse. A collapsed lung? That didn't sound good at all. It killed her to know that he was in so much pain. It made her have pain.

"his heart underwent some tough conditions and he went into cardiac arrest and we lost him a couple times, but got him back."

Peyton put her hand over her mouth to muffle a sob that escaped her throat. It suddenly became harder to breath inside that stupid waiting room. She couldn't stay there, not anymore. She ran out of the room, out of the hospital.

_Oh, oh, oh  
Oh, oh, oh  
Be my baby  
Oh, oh, oh  
I'll look after you_

---

"and that's how I ended up here." Lucas had just finished explained to Keith what happened.

Keith looked at his nephew with such proud eyes. He didn't know what to say, I mean of course he could go off on all the ways how stupid it was but he did the same exact thing. How could he not be proud? His nephew, who has been like a son, risked his life for his team, for a boy that he cared strongly for.

He smiled at Lucas as they were sitting there. He saw himself in Lucas and it made him feel good, like he accomplished something.

Lucas was going to make a great father someday, he already was being a great uncle, the uncle that Keith wanted him to be.

"can I stay here?" Lucas asked innocently.

"wh-what?" Keith was broken from his reverie when Lucas spoke.

"I mean, do I have to go back?"

"yes, well what do you want?" Keith asked.

Lucas sat there for a moment thinking.

_  
If ever there was a doubt  
My love she leans into me  
This most assuredly counts  
She says most assuredly_

"I want Peyton, I always have." He looked to his hands. "I want everything to be perfect again, like it was before."

_Oh, oh, oh  
Oh, oh, oh  
Be my baby  
I'll look after you  
_

"Luke." Keith said while shaking his head, he obviously still didn't get it. "you don't get that, what you want, without fighting for it." He stood up and kneeled in front of Lucas as if he was the dad and Lucas was his little boy. "you have to live your life and work if you want that. There isn't a magic lamp that you can rub to make a genie appear and grant you three wishes. Life doesn't work that way." He lifted Lucas' chin. He wanted Lucas to look him in the eyes and understand what he was saying. "we can only do the best we can to make it that way and with the right people and a great life, who needs the genie when you got something so genuine right in front of you?" Tears started to stream down Lucas' face at the end of Keith's speech.

"how could such a great man be taken from me?" he cried as more tears came down his face.

Keith smiled and placed a hand on Lucas neck. "maybe I had to die so a new great man would take my place." Lucas let a sob escape his throat and he lunged forward and wrapped his arms around his beloved uncle.

_It's always have and never hold  
You've begun to feel like home  
What's mine is yours to leave or take  
What's mine is yours to make your own_

They sat for that for about five minutes; just sitting in silence. He let Lucas cry in his shoulder and believe it or not it felt could to comfort the growing man again. It felt right, like how it was supposed to be, though it wouldn't last.

Lucas pulled away and slowly stood up, bringing Keith with him.

"hey Luke?" Keith asked to get Lucas' attention.

"yeah?" Lucas looked to his uncle with unsure eyes.

"I'm proud of you." Those could have been the best words that Lucas has ever heard, coming from his greatest role model. He brought his uncle into another hug as more tears fell from his eyes that showed the emotions of his conflicted heart.

"I want you to do something for me." He took the blonde boys head in his hands and held it about a foot away from his face. "I want you to be the man that I know you can be. I want you to go back there and show the world that Lucas Scott is a great man, because he is. I want you to love and be loved. I want you to back there and show your family how much you love them, because they need you." He leaned forward and kissed Lucas on his forehead just like he used to when Lucas was a little boy.

Lucas nodded, in that nod he promised all the things that were just said.

"one more thing." Lucas looked to his eyes again. "Be the kind of uncle that Jamie needs you to be."

"I promise." Lucas slowly let out. "I love you uncle Keith."

"I love you too, _my_ boy. Have a great life."

Keith placed his hand over Lucas' heart and then everything turned into a bright light.

For some reason Lucas knew that he was doing the right thing, that everything was going to be ok.

---

Peyton sat at the Rivercourt, in the middle. But something was different. She was sitting in front of something that was painted on the court. At her side sat some painting tools. She looked down at her drawing and began to cry.

There was a big red heart in the center. The heart had little cracks displayed all over but painted over them were little band aids and stitches. The heart read:

Lucas+Peyton

TLA

"I need you to be ok baby." If you looked at her it seemed as though she was talking to nothing, but to her this was everything. It felt like she was around him, she was in his special place after all.

"I need you to be ok because I love you and because I can't live without you." She furiously wiped at her tears. "you're the only one who can totally break my heart, but fix it with just one of your smiles or your amazing words. I need you to come back because I am going to love you forever Lucas Scott, you're my baby." At this point she fell to the side and started to cry uncontrollably.

_Oh, oh, oh  
Oh, oh, oh  
Be my baby  
Oh, oh, oh_

**A/N: so how was I for getting back?? Please tell me in a review, with the last couple days I have had I could really use them!!**

**How ya guys been??**

**Love**

**EM**


	11. Home

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better.**

**A/N: hey guys, well I'm not going to go into detail. I just got busy and all that jazz, a know?? That stuff called life?? Haha**

**Much thanks to my readers and reviewers and of course FAIRY T BIRD (tweetiebird), she just helps me so much and she doesn't even know it. So do you guys though, with your reviews, you don't even know!**

**I hope you enjoy this chapter!! **

**Chapter 10: Home-Daughtry**

_I'm staring out into the night,  
Trying to hide the pain. _

She didn't know how long she had been there. It could've been minutes, hours; she didn't know and to be honest she didn't really care.

It seemed like she was on a spiritual road trip; visiting all the places that she would always remember, places that reminded her of Lucas.

_I'm going to the place where love  
And feeling good don't ever cost a thing.  
And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain._

She walked along the beach to a spot where the grass met the sand. There was a rather large rock that had been stuck in the ground ever since she could remember. She sat in the sand, her back against the rock and ran her fingers over the letters that were carved into the hard surface.

LS+PS

She remembers a time, senior year, when they fell asleep on this rock or at least Lucas did, she was lying on him. It was shortly after they got together and they went there after Lucas took her on their first official date. It must have been the most uncomfortable thing to sleep on and the next day Karen was not very happy, but that was one of the greatest nights of her life and she's pretty sure that if you asked him, he would say the same thing.

She began to fall asleep, with the memories of them being together and the hope that maybe everything could work out.

_Well I'm going home,  
Back to the place where I belong,  
And where your love has always been enough for me._

---

_I'm not running from.  
No, I think you got me all wrong.  
I don't regret this life I chose for me. _

Lucas slowly began to come back. He hadn't opened his eyes yet, he was still getting used to his surroundings.

To be honest he was scared to open his eyes. The world was a scary place; life was a scary thing. He was scared of what was to come next. This tragedy changed everything; he could feel it.

He thought back to what happened, how long ago he didn't know, all the events that occurred during this life changing event. He remembered the Quentin with a gun entering the gym and threatening his team. He remembered walking out into the gym to help the lost boy that held the deadly weapon in his hands. He remembered convincing Quentin to let the team go and not too much time later the police entered the gym. He stepped in front of a bullet to save Quentin, put the poor lost boy lost control of his emotions once again and let his actions do the talking. The boy's body fell to the ground and he watched as Quentin stopped breathing.

All the things he remembered made him not want to go back and face the obstacle course that everyone else calls life. But then something else came to mind; Peyton.

Suddenly all the thoughts of the beautiful blonde girl came to his mind. He remembered the letter he wrote and seeing Peyton's terrified face as she held him, begging him to stay alive. He saw the fear and sadness in her eyes but he pushed those aside. Instead he focused on how beautiful she was and how much he wanted her to be his.

But those were just thoughts and memories. He didn't want those, though he cherished every one of them. He wanted to make more memories with her, with everyone. In order to do that, there was only one thing to do, face everything and keep pushing through.

The words that Keith spoke to him as he was leaving suddenly brightened in his mind.

_When the world tells you to give up, hope whispers "try one more time."_

So maybe that's what he needed to do, maybe he needed to give it one more try. Maybe if he gave it another chance and took that risk, the obstacle course of life would be bearable because he has great things in life that serve as a power boost; the good things in life give him what he needs to move past the difficult things in life.

_But these places and these faces are getting old,  
So I'm going home.  
Well I'm going home. _

---

_The miles are getting longer, it seems,  
The closer I get to you. _

He hesitantly opened his eyes. Almost immediately after he did, they fell shut due to the bright lights. He opened them, slower this time, and blinked to adjust to the difference in light.

"Lucas." He heard a familiar voice cry out in relief.

---

"Peyton." Brooke sighed in relief as she found her friend leaning against a rock. She slowly walked over and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Peyton." She shook her lightly.

Peyton stirred and when her eyes opened, she was surprised to find Brooke in front of her.

"Brooke?" Peyton was still a little dazed from her sleep. She sat up to a sitting position while Brooke sat down in the sand next to her. "what are you doing here?"

"oh you know, I was just going for a walk, looking for a cute boy…in the middle of the night…but I just found you." Brooke shrugged and smiled. When she looked closely she saw a smile tug at the corners of Peyton's lips. Brooke's face turned serious and she put her arm around Peyton's shoulders. "I was looking for you, buddy."

Peyton leaned her head on Brooke's shoulder and Brooke laid her head on Peyton's head. They sat like that for God knows how long. It may have been awkward for anybody else, but that's not how it is with their friendship. They are comfortable with each other and know each other. They know when the other doesn't want to talk and they know when the other really needs it.

Peyton and Brooke both sighed at the same time. "whats up with P. Sawyer right now?" Brooke asked softly.

Peyton lifted her head off of Brooke's shoulders, tears evident in her eyes.

"it's all so hard Brooke." Tears began to fall from her green eyes. She pulled her knees to her chest and hugged them tightly, staring out into the water; altogether showing off her vulnerable state.

"what's hard?" She was pretty sure she knew the answer but she wanted to hear Peyton say it; she wanted her to voice it, it almost makes it more real.

"everything." Peyton's voice softened and she leaned her chin on top of her knees and looked into the waves. By everything she meant the whole situation they were in and all the complications in her relationship with Lucas. "why does it always have to be this difficult?" she turned to her friend with a frustrated face. "why can't it all just stop, why can't the world let me be happy? Did I do something so bad that I had to be punished?"

Brooke waited until Peyton cooled down a little bit before she began to speak. "Peyton, I don't think the world is punishing you." She said in a soft, soothing voice. Peyton looked to her friend, trying to figure out what she was getting at. "I think all this stuff has happened so you could become stronger." Peyton gave her a skeptical look. "think about it Peyton! You are such a strong woman, and you don't even see it." Brooke had her hand on Peyton's shoulder, making sure she was paying attention. "Without all the shit that has happened, you wouldn't be where you are today." Tears sprung in her eyes and more tears began to stream from Peyton's eyes. "The things that have happened in the past help you become the person you are today. It may not have been easy or fun, but look at you!" She motioned to Peyton with her hands. "look at us! We are two amazing people, and if you ask me, it was all worth it." Brooke couldn't hold back anymore, she wrapped her arms around Peyton and it wasn't long before her friend did the same.

"I love you B. Davis." Peyton mumbled into the brunette's shoulder.

"I love you, P. Sawyer." Brooke slowly pulled away and they smiled a little at how many tears had fallen. "don't you dare give up hope." She poked the blonde. "because it isn't over until you stop fighting."

Peyton gained a little more confidence that everything was going to be ok. Though she would only get her fulfillment from the man she loved.

It made it so hard on her, that he broke her heart. She just wanted to curl up in a little ball and shield herself from the world; she didn't want to let love in and get her heart broken again, she was afraid she wouldn't be able to fix it at all.

_I've not always been the best man or friend for you.  
But your love, it remains true.  
And I don't know why.  
You always seem to give me another try. _

But she loved him, and if she learned anything from the past week, it was that you have to act now, before it's too late.

_So I'm going home,  
Back to the place where I belong,  
And where your love has always been enough for me.  
I'm not running from.  
No, I think you got me all wrong.  
I don't regret this life I chose for me.  
But these places and these faces are getting old_

---

Lucas opened his eyes, wanting to see a head full of blonde curls and eyes full of green that looked like the most beautiful jewels in the world. But when we looked around, he saw none.

_  
Be careful what you wish for,  
'Cause you just might get it all.  
You just might get it all, _

He was hoping she would be there, right there sitting in the uncomfortable chair. He thought that maybe she would be there, waiting for him. That's what we wished for, before the school shooting. When the clock hit 11:11 he wished for something, anything that would bring Peyton back to him; get them back together.

_And then some you don't want.  
Be careful what you wish for,  
'Cause you just might get it all.  
You just might get it all, yeah. _

But she wasn't there waiting for him. He didn't know if she got the letter and he wasn't sure if she was anywhere near.

"Lucas." He heard the familiar voice call his name again and he turned towards the sound.

"Nathan." He rasped, his throat was dry and that mixed with the pain made his voice sound like a wreck.

"oh thank God, Lucas." Nathan said his name again, he was so relieved that his brother was ok, he was going to be ok. Tears that stung the back of his eyes finally fell, going over the previous tears that had dried on his face. He stood up from the chair he was sitting in and walked to the bed, carefully putting his arms around his brother. "I'm so glad you're ok."

Lucas used as much strength as he had to hug back. His brother wasn't Peyton, but he loved him and was so glad that he was here.

"Lucas!" Haley cried. Jaime was taken home by Mouth and Skills. After much arguing they agreed to go home with the little guy and get some rest themselves.

"hey Hales." Came Lucas' raspy voice again. She enveloped him in a tight hug, trying her best not to touch his wound.

"oh, sorry Luke, I'll get you some water." He walked over and grabbed the water that sat at the table and gave some to Lucas. "I'm going to get the doctor ok." Lucas nodded towards his younger brother but he felt a little worried too. Nathan was shaking a little and being really nice and at any moment looked like he was going to break down.

---

_Oh, well I'm going home,  
Back to the place where I belong,  
And where your love has always been enough for me. _

She walked into the hospital with her best friend at her side. She was ready now, ready to face what was blocking her way from being happy. She said goodbye to feeling hopeless and earned herself a second chance at being happy.

_  
I'm not running from.  
No, I think you got me all wrong. _

_I don't regret this life I chose for me. _

She walked down the hall; the door was growing nearer and nearer. She placed her hand on the handle and hesitantly walked in. When she became visible from behind the wall everyone turned to look at the new body that entered the room.

Once she saw him everything else in the room became a blur. They locked eyes and his eyes at that moment were so beautiful and she had never been happier to see them.

She was here; she was here in his hospital room, to see him. He relished in the sight of her blonde curls and never wanted to miss a glimpse of those green eyes.

Tears began to fall from her eyes, their gazes still on each other.

_But these places and these faces are getting old.  
I said these places and these faces are getting old,  
_

Ignoring the doctor that stood close to the bed, she quickly walked forward and wrapped her arms around Lucas, _her _man.

"Lucas." Was all she could muster, but that was enough. He got all her emotions from her voice and the look on her face. He loved it.

She buried her head in the crook of his neck and breathed deeply; she was finally _home._

_So I'm going home.  
I'm going home._

**A/N: so what did you guys think?? Please please review, I put so much thought into this chapter. It took me an hour to find a song!!! Haha I always put too much thought into it, but I think it pays off. I really need reviews I love them.**

**So…how are my readers doin??**

**Peace out home slice(s)**

**Em**


	12. I'm Yours

**Please review! I love reviews, they make me feel so much better!**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned OTH, but I don't. Any song lyrics in here, are not mine, I just think they are a good tool to make writing better**

**A/N: Ok please don't HATE me!! I'm so sorry that this took so long. I have seriously been busy and I got hurt in rugby again so that sucks. But I still should have gotten it done. I'm so sorry, please accept my apology.**

**This is sadly the last chapter. It was so fun writing it and the reviews have been so amazing, I'm sad to see it go.**

**I hope you like the end!**

**Chapter 11: I'm Yours ~ Jason Mraz**

_Well you've done done me and you bet I felt it  
I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted  
I fell right through the cracks  
and now I'm trying to get back_

He didn't know where it all went wrong. One day everything was perfect. That day was about 4 years ago. He was so happy and everything actually seemed like it was going to be ok, like life was going to be good.

If you asked him 4 years ago what his life would be like in the future. He would have said that he would be with his girl, maybe even married to his girl, a college graduate on his way to making his dream come true. His dream included the girl.

Now everything was different. He was just a small town basketball coach, but with that came more than he expected. Something happened that he didn't think would, could, ever happen again. He never saw it coming, but then again that's life and in life you never know what tomorrow will bring, that's for someone else to decide.

He didn't think that life would be so difficult at the young age he was. He didn't expect something that happened in his high school years would come back and strike him in the heart again when he was a basketball coach for that same school.

He became so lost from the person that he was back when he was happy. He didn't know how to find his way back, though he desperately tried and tried to find that one thing to hold onto. He was beginning to give up but he couldn't do that. If he learned anything it was that giving up gets you nowhere.

_  
Before the cool done run out  
I'll be giving it my bestest  
Nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention  
I reckon its again my turn to win some or learn some_

His dream still included her.

_I won't hesitate no more, no more  
It cannot wait, I'm yours_

She still had his heart.

---

It was around six in the morning. Nathan was out for an early run, he couldn't sleep well so he decided to go out. As strong he was trying to be for everyone, the shooting still affected him. It had a great impact on his life.

He couldn't help but think if there was anything he could have done to prevent it from happening. Maybe if he just talked to Quentin, maybe if he just went to the gym that day to make sure everything was ok, what if…there were so many. But he didn't have a time machine and beating himself up with all those what if's were tearing him down. He just needed something to take the guilt away; he wanted something to reassure him that he could make things better.

He stepped into the hospital, he wasn't sure if his brother was up but he needed to see him. He hadn't really talked to him much, the nurses were always running tests and Lucas was always sleeping. He wasn't mad at that, he knew that his brother needed to heal, he was thankful that his brother was healing.

The elevator dinged and he stepped out, walking down the hall to Lucas' room. He quietly opened the door; if Lucas was asleep, he didn't want to wake him. He walked into the room, expecting to see a sleeping body on the bed. When he looked to the bed he only saw white sheets and a blanket carelessly thrown to the side.

His first reaction was to call the nurse.

"can I help you?" the nurse asked sweetly as she entered the room.

"umm yes actually. Where is my brother?" he asked, his voice just begging for a positive answer.

---

Peyton woke to the ringing of her cell phone. She was very tired and right now did not seem like the best time to get up.

"you better be dying." Peyton didn't even look at the caller ID as she answered her phone.

"_well I'm not dying" Nathan chuckled softly on the other end. "Go back to sleep, I can tell you're not with him but thanks for picking up."_

She suddenly became alert. "you can tell I'm not with who?" she asked, sitting up in her bed.

"_Peyton it's alright, don't worry just go back to sleep." He really didn't want her to worry, she needed sleep. She hadn't gotten any in awhile. He wished he hadn't bothered her._

"Nathan, I'm up and of course I'm going to worry because I know you're talking about Lucas."

_He took a deep breath. "I walked into Lucas' room and he wasn't there."_

"what do you mean he wasn't there?" Concern started to wash over her and she was not standing.

"_he wasn't there. I walked into the room and he wasn't there. The nurses don't know where he is so I thought that maybe he would be with you." Nathan finished his long rant and calmed down._

"Why would he be with me?" She honestly didn't know. She hadn't talked to Lucas a lot. After he woke up he became sheltered and broody and just shut people out.

"_you already know the answer to that Peyton, you know him better than anyone."_

Her eyes fell closed, she did know the answer. Well at least she thought she did. "I'll find him."

"_Peyton, you don't have to, I'm sure he's fine." It was almost as if he was trying to convince her more than himself. "I can look for him."_

"no, I-I need to talk to him Nathan." She fell back onto the bed. "I can tell I'm losing him and I need him to know that he is going to be ok."

_Nathan nodded his head out of habit but then spoke into the phone. "ok, just make sure he gets back to the hospital."_

"trust me, he is going back to that hospital." They said their goodbyes and Peyton set her phone on her nightstand. There were so many places that she could go to find him. It looks like she would have to take them one at a time.

_  
Well open up your mind and see like me  
Open up your plans and damn you're free  
Look into your heart and you'll find love love love_

---

_Listen to the music of the moment, people dance and sing we're just one big family  
It's our God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love love  
_

She hopped in her comet and put in mix cd. It just happened to be a mix cd that she received from Lucas all those years ago.

She drove by clothes over bros, he wasn't on top of the roof. She went to the beach, he wasn't there either. She finally decided to hit the Rivercourt.

She didn't see him there, but decided to step out anyways. She walked onto the court and bent down and ran a hand over what she painted.

Lucas Scott broke her heart; he tore it from her chest. But wherever he was, he took it with him. He always had her heart. And she was scared to open it up to him again, to let him in. But he was the only one who could fix her. And who better to open your heart to than the holder of it?

_So I won't hesitate no more, no more  
It cannot wait I'm sure_

She stood up and looked around. Really took time to acknowledge her surroundings; the beautiful trees that brought so much beauty into the world; the sound of the river; the smell of fresh air. It was all so beautiful and comforting. It was home and she knew this is where she wanted to stay. There was just one thing missing.

_  
There's no need to complicate  
Our time is short_

But the best thing is, he lives in this beautiful place too.

_  
This is our fate, I'm yours_

---

He sat at the cemetery in front of the grave stone of somebody who was very special; someone who had a big impact on Lucas' life. He died at such a young age, and for all the wrong reasons. Lucas stepped in front of that boy to save him, but the result was not what was intended.

The boy died out of anger and grief, fear and confusion. He hated everything so much that he brought a gun into school and threatened everyone. But Lucas knows he didn't mean it, he was just confused and he was hurting.

He wished he could have saved him, he tried actually. But what he did wasn't enough.

---

She saw him as she pulled into the cemetery. She thought that maybe she would find him here, but she expected him to be in a different part of the cemetery, a different tombstone.

Before she walked over to see him, she had a stop to make.

_(Doo da doo doo doo doo d'n' dooo, da doo...)___

Do you want to, come on, scootch over closer dear  
And I will nibble your ear

"hey mom." She said softly. "I know it's been a while since I've come to see you, and I'm sorry for that." She took a deep breath. "but I wanted you to be the first one to know, about the decision I was going to make."

_I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror  
And bending over backwards just to try to see it clearer_

She smiled to herself and all the thoughts she had, all the dreams. "I'm going to let myself be happy mom." She went into a sitting position. "I'm going to put the past behind me and finally let myself be happy. I'm going to let him in and I'm going to love him."

_But my breath fogged up the glass  
And so I drew a new face and I laughed_

A few tears slid down her cheeks. "because I need to, I want to and I know that if you were here, you would tell me to follow my heart." She breathed deeply and more tears fell from her eyes, yet a small smile graced her lips. "so that's what I'm going to do."

_  
I guess what I'll be saying is there ain't no better reason  
To rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons  
It's what we aim to do  
Our name is our virtue_

"thank you mom, for being here with me. For still being the one that I can come to when I need someone. I love you and I'll see you soon." She didn't say goodbye because she knew she would be back, very soon.

She stood up and wiped at her eyes. She looked up at the sky and took a deep breath. "Happiness." She said simply and she began to walk, could one thing change your life so greatly?

_I won't hesitate no more, no more  
It cannot wait I'm sure  
There's no need to complicate  
Our time is short  
This is our fate, I'm yours_

_---_

She approached him hesitantly. She prayed that things would all work out, that they could both just be happy. She knew it would be rough, but she was going to try with all her heart, with everything she had.

_Well open up your mind and see like me  
Open up your plans and damn you're free  
Look into your heart and you'll find that the sky is yours  
so please don't please don't please don't.  
There's no need to complicate  
'cause our time is short  
This oh this oh this is our fate I'm yours_

She stood there, right behind him, not quite sure what to say.

_  
Oh I'm yours_

He heard someone approaching. He felt the presence behind him and he just knew, he knew it was her.

It was silent, they both knew that the other was there, and they both knew that they had things to talk about.

"I couldn't save him." He said sadly as he stared at the stone in front of him. "I tried but I couldn't save him." Tears started to fall down his face.

Compassion washed over her face. "Lucas you talked to him, you cared for him. You tried to get through to him, God Luke you took a bullet for him." She knelt down beside him. "if anything Luke you did save him, you taught him that life is hard b-but that there is always something to fight for." She grabbed his hand and intertwined it with hers. "by risking your life for him you showed how much you cared, and that matters Lucas." She brought a hand up to cup his cheek and turned it towards her so she could see his eyes. "it matters because you showed him that someone cared and that he wasn't alone."

"I just wish he didn't have to die Peyton." Tears started to fall from his eyes. "I wish I had more time to talk to him, more time to help him, but I'll never get that." He shook his head, her hand still on her cheek. "what if there was something I could've done."

"don't." she shook her head. "don't do that, don't do that to yourslelf." She pulled him closer and into her arms, softly not too much to hurt him. It was time to tell him; time to tell him how she felt and what she wanted. She couldn't hold it in anymore, she needed him to know.

_  
I won't hesitate no more  
Oh no more no more no more  
It's our God-forsaken right to be loved, I'm sure_

"you are a great man Lucas Scott, an amazing man. And you're going to do great things." She pulled away from him too look into those beautiful blue eyes. "and I want to be there when you do those things." She said seriously. Tears started to fall down her face. "I want to be there with you through everything. You know why?" she asked. When he shook his head no she took a deep breath and the corners of her mouth turned up into a soft smile. "because I love you. I love you, Lucas Scott and I'm gonna love you forever."

_Theres no need to complicate  
Our time is short_

_This is our fate, I'm yours_

A small smile graced his lips. He cupped her face with one hand and slowly pulled her in for a soft kiss to the lips. But in that kiss was everything. He kissed her forehead and pulled her in for a hug.

"I love you too."

_No I won't hesitate no more, no more  
This cannot wait I'm sure_

"how would you like to just be happy?" she asked, still locked in his safe embrace.

"that sounds perfect."

They stood up and she started to pull him towards her car.

"I don't mean to ruin the moment, but you are going back to the hospital. You scared the crap out of me." She said seriously, but with the smirk that played on his lips she couldn't help but smile.

---

They walked back to his hospital room and Haley, Nathan, Brooke and Jamie sat in there.

"Uncle Lucas!" Jamie shouted and he ran to his uncle, but slowed down as he remembered his uncle's condition. He hugged him on the legs softly. "I missed you uncle Lucas." He mumbled into his legs.

Lucas chuckled softly. "I missed you to buddy."

"Oh my god!"Brooke shouted. "The Scott smirk!" Everyone looked at Brooke like she was crazy, what was she talking about? "My P. Sawyer totally put that there!" she smiled proudly.

Nathan nodded and smiled. "It's good to have you back man." He brought him into a man hug.

"Hales." Lucas held up his arms for Haley to come. She nodded with a few tears and walked into his arms.

"not to ruin the moment, but you Lucas Scott…" she poked him on the chest, "…need to get in that bed." They all laughed at Haley's protective mode.

He couldn't deny that he was exhausted and he was in a lot of pain, but the pain didn't seem so bad with everyone else around, it was perfect.

_There's no need to complicate  
Our time is short_

"oh and for your information Brooke…" Lucas looked Brooke straight in the eyes, "…she's my Peyton Sawyer." He smirked and looked into Peyton's beautiful green eyes. She smiled brightly.

_  
This is our fate, I'm yours, I'm yours_

That couldn't have sounded more perfect.

**The End**

**A/N: How was it?? Please let me know, this is the last chapter, please just one more review from each reader. I know it took me a long time, but I would love to hear from you guys!!**

**Thank you so much all you readers and reviewers, this story is nothing without you! (seriously I mean that, if people don't like it, it's so much harder to write)**

**Oh I'm starting a new story. But I'm writing some of it before I post it, ya know so I can post updates sooner. PM me if you want a summary!!**

**3 Em =D**


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